A
female
age
30-35,
*113yx8
writes:me and my ex were together for a year and 8 months. I really cared for him but was slowly starting to realize that I didn't care for him as a solemate type. Then, I was with a guy who i was very infactuated with before me and my ex started dating and I cheated with him. I felt so bad so I told my ex and broke up. The problem is, he is still so in love with me and I feel so bad because I don't want to lead him on and I've told him that. Hes so amazing in every way and I really wish I wanted to be with him but I just don't feel that way, it seems so crazy. whats wrong with me? Also, he told me the other day that I was his first (he didn't tell me that the whole time we went out!) he wasn't mine but now I can see why he's so attached. I want to comfort him but I just keep feeling bad because I've been where he is and I know how it hurts. Is there anything I can do to help? i just feel like I keep hurting him but I'm defientially not trying to!
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (16 November 2010):
 Like a band-aid Babycakes.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 November 2010):
 You can help him by cutting off contact with him. Think about it, if a guy dumped you would you want him to stick around and help you get over him? Heck, no! He needs to move on, on his own...he doesn't need your help. I know you have good intentions but by "helping" him you're only giving him false hope that you're going to get back together, so you're really hurting him.
I suggest you cut off the contact and give him space, let him move on al by his self then maybe one day in the future you guys can be friends again. Feel free to browse the Breaking Up section of this site, you will also find additional answers there!
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 November 2010):
 Hi you need to stay away from him, ignore him if he contacts you and stay well away from him. You need to be cruel to be kind and am afraid that the only way he is going to get over you is if you both have no contact. I no you will probably find this hard to do but sweetie its the best way believe me. I know its hard to ignore someone, especially someone we do care about but it will be best for him in the long run believe me..
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