A
female
age
30-35,
*hanelcarlyne
writes:We met and have been together since the day we met. We both agree there was an instant connection between us and decided we wouldn't rush things and give our relationship the titles boyfriend girl girlfriend. That was 10 months ago. We don't really argue, talk about the future, I've met his friends and family and he agreed to meet my dad when he flies in from IL. He never hid that he had a beer once in a while with the brothers of his ex of a few years. Well recently he confessed that he's confused that he has feelings for me but he cant have me when he still feels for his ex and that he's confused. Is there anything I can do or say to let him see what he has with me? His family all agrees she is drama and even he has said that all they do is fight..where me and him have only argued over more serious sits... what do you suggest I do? Please.
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female
reader, chanelcarlyne +, writes (10 April 2010):
chanelcarlyne is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwow in the back of my mind ive thought about that to break contact and have him decide what he wants... since then he has told me over the phone that he knows for a fact he wont back with her but now the complete trust I had in him is broken but I am willing to allow it to grow. How can I continue to let our relationship grow but take a few steps back and not have sex. He has been having it too good with me and having it all with little commitment. How do you suggest I word what to say to him to continue the persuit for something between us but I guess downgrade because it is clear we are feeling for each other but it just hasnt grown into anything major yet......
A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (9 April 2010):
 Break all contact. He will then be forced to make a decision. You deserve better and the respect. 10 months into the relationship and now he wants to figure our his feelings? Shows how little respect and love he has for you. Move on before you get hurt.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (9 April 2010):
There is nothing you can do. Only he can get over her, and he has to do it alone. Whether you say with him knowing that you're not his number 1 is another thing. It might be worth thinking about a break so he can work it out for himself.
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