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female
,
anonymous
writes: What is the best way to get back at your boyfriend for hurting you, lying to you, making you feel as though you are not important enough? But just enough for him to see what he has and take better care of it, and respect it, and the relationship, and make him like butter?Thank you. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Dazzerg  +, writes (17 April 2006):
 You are probably not going to like this but if you take the revenge route then there is every chance the relationship will end in a spiral of tit-for-tat reprisals. If you were outside a relationship but being played id suggest you make it clear others are interested but you are in a relationship. If you do that then you cede the moral high ground.
Its only natural when you have been hurt to want to hurt back and feeling that way is not 'wrong' at all however sometimes it is wise not to follow through on our desires/wishs. You may think that is easy for me to say and it certainly is easier. I have been in your position, I can be very verbally wounding when I want to be and I have lashed back but when its clear there is no relationship left to save.
Personally I would advise you reastrain the revenge impulse in favour of making him work for your love and affection. Make it plainly clear to him that he gets nothing for free now, that your trust and love has to be earnt through his hard work and dedication to you. Sorry if that is not the answer you wanted. Take care and good luck.
A
male
reader, Dazzerg +, writes (17 April 2006):
You are probably not going to like this but if you take the revenge route then there is every chance the relationship will end in a spiral of tit-for-tat reprisals. If you were outside a relationship but being played id suggest you make it clear others are interested but you are in a relationship. If you do that then you cede the moral high ground.
Its only natural when you have been hurt to want to hurt back and feeling that way is not 'wrong' at all however sometimes it is wise not to follow through on our desires/wishs. You may think that is easy for me to say and it certainly is easier. I have been in your position, I can be very verbally wounding when I want to be and I have lashed back but when its clear there is no relationship left to save.
Personally I would advise you reastrain the revenge impulse in favour of making him work for your love and affection. Make it plainly clear to him that he gets nothing for free now, that your trust and love has to be earnt through his hard work and dedication to you. Sorry if that is not the answer you wanted. Take care and good luck.
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