Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, unclezak  +, writes (15 June 2009):
I think you would be best off taking your bro in laws side so your family still has access to the kids. They are the most important at the moment. He's probably going through emotional turmoil as well as physical exhaustion after his stay at home wife has deserted them all.
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female
reader, RCK  +, writes (14 June 2009):
RCK is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo think this is a story is beyond me? Unfortunately this is real life. My mum and dad went over to see the children today and were asked to leave as he had visitors coming. My Dad feels so embrassed/ashamed when my brother inlaw basically spat that she had left him in so much debt too. They left his house and felt so helpless when the children were crying for their mother. They noticed the youngst is back in nappies?
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): female anon. You are my hero. Your story and your response brought tears to my eyes. What a story...
just a guy
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2009): My mother did the exact same thing when I was 8. My sister was 5 and my brother 2. Your sister is nothing but a selfish bitch and the children are better off without her. All you can do is be there for them and love them unconditionally.
I hope that her husband does get full custody. In my experiance she wont even try to contest it like my mother didnt as she will be busy living in the lap of luxury.
People like her make me sick. Growing up my dad never bad mouthed my mum and we were free to contact her if we pleased. Her number was written on our phone. But you know what. We did for a while but none of us have spoken to her in over ten years now. Her husband is dying and she wants us back in her life as she has no one....too bad.
Your sister has made her bed, hope she likes lying in it. Money doesn't buy happiness and she is the worst kind of scum for doing that to her kids. Cheers!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2009): why do i get the feeling you condone you sisters running away. she di not have the decency to even fetch her kids from school. your sister is a bitch for abondoing her kids, she is only thinking about her rich lover and openly opened them legs for him. she went to tailand for 5 days of sex and relaxation. you have hid her secret from her hb. you are shieding you sister from her wrongdoing. you seem more angry at your sisters husband than at her. why? can you not see the errors of her ways. SHE ABONDONED 4 KIDS YET YOU SIDE WITH HER. it is like you are giving her your blessings to fuck up 4 kids lives. your sister is a despicable person. she only cares about herself. morals? what morals. by hiding the truth about her whereabouts you are actually aiding her wrongdoings. by keeping quiet you are just as guilty. what has these 4 kids done to deserve a mother like her. do you even think she deserves to be with them after she returns from her holiday with her lover? it is women like her that corrups the legal system. they get custody of their innocent kids and they mess up their kids lives. your sister is one of them. and you knowing the full extent of her whereabouts are actually helping her get away with this crime. what does it say about you. hiding the truth and not disclosing the facts?
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female
reader, RCK +, writes (12 June 2009):
RCK is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the great advice. When I read them I was able to think alot clearer. I have decided to tell the children that mummy and daddy have some problems to sort out between themselves and they both love them and will sit down one day and speak with them about what is happening. I am unsure about the 10 year old as he was angry and called her a stupid idiot when she never picked them up from school on the day she left and now he thinks he was the cause of her not returning. I am only on speaking levels with the father in the hopes he does not up and take off somewhere with the kids because of the state he is in and he is my line to stay in contact with the kids. Whilst I was at work today he contacted the police and reported my sister missing and abandontment of the children to him. Now it looks like he is going for full custody. I have still not told him what I know and received a text from her this afternoon **"10 minutes before I fly out" "I am fine and happy but feeling guilty"** I was so angry I never replied to it and am not planning too. I need to think about my family too but think I am packing too much on my plate but do not want to walk out of these kids lives because and do what their mother did. One more for the Days of our Lives family the father/husband/brother inlaw has announced that he is Bi and the ok to see another man. My head is pounding bad.
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A
female
reader, RCK +, writes (12 June 2009):
RCK is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the great advice. When I read them I was able to think alot clearer. I have decided to tell the children that mummy and daddy have some problems to sort out between themselves and they both love them and will sit down one day and speak with them about what is happening. I am unsure about the 10 year old as he was angry and called her a stupid idiot when she never picked them up from school on the day she left and now he thinks he was the cause of her not returning. I am only on speaking levels with the father in the hopes he does not up and take off somewhere with the kids because of the state he is in and he is my line to stay in contact with the kids. Whilst I was at work today he contacted the police and reported my sister missing and abandontment of the children to him. Now it looks like he is going for full custody. I have still not told him what I know and received a text from her this afternoon **"10 minutes before I fly out" "I am fine and happy but feeling guilty"** I was so angry I never replied to it and am not planning too. I need to think about my family too but think I am packing too much on my plate but do not want to walk out of these kids lives because and do what their mother did. One more for the Days of our Lives family the father/husband/brother inlaw has announced that he is Bi and the ok to see another man. My head is pounding bad.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2009): Hell yes tell him. Like him or hate him, this marriage is over. There is no "working through" something like this.
What's left to discuss? Without saying a word, she demonstrated what she thought of her husband and children and they came in a distant second to what she believes is wealth. Maybe his is rich but maybe he is not. Remember, Madoff in NY made everybody believe he was worth billions and he turned out to be nothing but a two-bit cheap crook.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2009): well. when your mom's a gold digging whore, nothing is really going to make you feel better in the long run.
but for now i'd tell them that mommy still loves them very much and both of their parents will still be in their lives. and even though it's a big and difficult change, you and the rest of the family will be there for them. what they need right now is a support system. that's you.
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