A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi, i have been dating this man for about 7 years he is married but him and his wife were separated, me and this guy did everything together i fell head over heels in love, he told me that he loved me too but the problem came in at when i moved in with him we have been living together for about 6 months, and we were splitting the bills down the middle, so recently he tells me that i need to find somewhere else to stay because his wife got evicted from where she was, and that he was moving her back in with him, so i need to go somewhere else. The kicker is he want us to still be close and see each other when his wife is not around or he would come to my place wherever i go. I can't afford to move anywhere else because of a job layoff, and i am feeling helpless, homeless and no doubt hurting very deeply, because i have to suddenly leave what was called home for me. Please can someone respond, and let me know that this is not the end, and shed some light on the situation.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2009): Good luck - telling him it's over was obviously hard - and you must be pretty lost and confused right now - I hope you can remain strong and that you have friends around you for support. I hope the future is brighter for you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi, here is the update to wife is moving back home, and I had to move out. wife moved back in. I left I had no place to go, I was sleeping in my truck, and I finally woke up, he leaves messages on my phone, asking me where am I and am I alright . because he is worried. Well my reply to him was: I am doing well, I don't need your help, I don't want to see you again, and stay away from me, I pretended everything was o.k. so that he didn't think that he got the best of me. yes I gave this man 7 years of my life and loved him dearly, this was truly a lesson in life that most have too learn, but ladies don't do this, because no matter how much you put into it, never get anything much out. I can't get my 7 yrs back ,I can only move forward.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): Honey - if you were not you and were reading that post what would you think? It's an absolute joke! This guy doesn't respect you - he likes the convenience of you, but when it comes down to it - there are many other things above you on his list of priorities.
I suspect there is something pretty wrong with this man - you'd do well to make a clean break - let his wife come home and have him - go find someone who'll put you first.
Hope this has taught you that married guys are not a good idea??
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): Bad situation, anonymous. But, you got yourself into it. If I had a counseling service, I would have in big letters on the wall..."LEAVE MARRIED PEOPLE ALONE! You are just asking for problems like this. This guy is a total dork, but, you had seven years to find that out. You ignored all clues...or you just did not care. Get out and away from this. Go to social services if you must and get help. Then get work and get on your own. And don't ever make such a mistake again! Start being a "carer of yourself" and stop trying to find someone to take care of you. I know you worked before, but you depended on the wrong "insurance policy". Guys like this are never "single". They are still tied. Never take anyone's word that they are divorced and "free". Men lie, hon...they lie. But, not all do. There are decent men out there. Learn to know the difference.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): What a terrible situation. I really do feel for you. But you have to ask yourself, why after sharing a life and home with this man do you have to go to sneaking around and seeing him where you wont get caught by his wife? This man isnt thinking of you and what this is doing to you. That isnt fair to you at all, none of this is! I agree with ArmyMedic. You have to get away from him and start fresh. Find someone who will put you first.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): How horrible, 7 years? He's either with you 100% or he's not! What an ass! How can he ask you his long time partner to move out for someone he is no longer with, something else is going on. How unfair and awful for you!
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male
reader, ArmyMedic  +, writes (14 March 2009):
 Wow, this is a terrible situation to be in, maybe when you started dating a married guy you should have pushed for him to legally end his marriage.
Any guy who remains married over that period of time MUST still have feelings for his wife and now he wants his cake and to eat it, you are the other woman in his marriage and will come second to his wife.
You need to take this as a completely new start and have nothing to do with this man as he will continue to hurt you.
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