A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have this friend at uni and we have kniow each other for a while 2 years. We like each other and there is a lot of sexaul tension between us. I want to be with him and be his girlfiend but his actions confuse me. He says he is too busy for a relationship but he is interested in having sex with me. i refuse to have sex without a relationship so we have a conflict of interests. The things that confuses me about him is that he is willing to go places with me..talk on the phone on a regular basis and have sex..isn't that a girlfriend? Why doesn't he give me the title it is really important to me to proceed to intimacy.Is he playing me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Isis-Bree  +, writes (25 March 2011):
He seriously sounds like all he wants is a physical relationship without commitment. You deserve a guy that wants to date you and hold your hand, make you feel special and feel adored like you are the only woman for him. Don't settle for second best. Your expectations are really not too high, you deserve everything that goes with a healthy relationship. If you have sex with him, you will become emotionally involved and it will be harder to leave him, so don't give yourself to him unless he can prove to you that he is serious about you. Unless ofcourse you are looking for a friend with benefits. Then unfortunately the "girlfriend title" will never be yours.
A
male
reader, Maverickjuniper  +, writes (25 March 2011):
Does he buy you lunch? Open doors for you? Do you guys cuddle? Do you two talk inappropriate to one another in a titillating sense?
Now, do you want to have sex with him?
he does want to with you... that is clear.
You have to decide. Are you a fixture or are you a princes that he protects and provides for. Tell him straight up! No relationship-no sexiness!
:)
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A
male
reader, Manitobesk  +, writes (25 March 2011):
Yes, he is playing you... So either accept to have only casual sex with him, or keep your distance.
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A
female
reader, goldensunnystar +, writes (24 March 2011):
I agree! Don't give into having sex. He plainly told you what he wants and he means it. By having sex you agree to his terms and conditions.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (24 March 2011):
 He's playing you. Never ever give up sex in hopes that it will spark feelings in him. Some people get physical hoping that it will lead to a relationship. You sound like you're too smart to fall into that trap.
What he want is a no strings attached sexual friendship, or Friends with Benefits. He doesn't want a relationship...he wants a booty call.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2011): if he is going to be way to busy to be with you beside sex . get rid of him . he is using you for sex because your letting him . if he knows your going to give him sex and he knows he can rope you back into it whenever he wants . you have to decide if that is what your willing to put up with him treating you like a doormat . he is not going to change anytime . your worth more than that . its going to be up and down rollercoaster .so you have to decide when you want to get off .
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