A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I broke an ultimatum with my boyfriend and he broke up with me. I want to just die! I promised I wouldn't do shots anymore, and that night I did one. But at the time I really didn't think it was a huge deal. I was leaving, and someone bought the whole bar a round. I literaly went home 10 later and just went to bed. sober not drunk at all. he found out and is so mad and broke up with me. I am so sad I don't know what to do. The more today goes on, the more I see how my actions seemed like it didin't matter and that he doesn't matter. what do I do? I ruined everything. I can't be without him.
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male
reader, Illithid +, writes (20 December 2010):
 It doesn't sound like this one shot is the problem, it's just the straw that broke the camel's back and is only the latest in a long sting of arguments, am I right? And it sounds like this is more a matter of trust. You broke your word to him. No, you weren't drunk. But you did break your word. And "he found out" doesn't sound like you're the one that told him. Without trust, relationships crash and burn.
At this point, you need to regain his trust in you and show that you can be totally and completely honest with him. If this has been an ongoing issue, you may need to be SUPER honest, sacrificing your privacy and being more transparent than anyone should ever have to be. It would mean giving up normal benefit of the doubt and being on the defensive, all the time. Is he worth that? It would mean that even when he accuses you of things, you'd have to calmly defend yourself, even if he won't believe you or calls you a liar. Is he worth that?
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