A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my LT partner for nine years. Lots of my friends who have been with their partners for about 3-4 are getting married and having children. My partner had a big depression spell so is recovering from that before we do those things but I can't help feeling sick to my stomach every time someone else gets married for has a child. I'm not a jealous person usually but this is bringing out some horrible internal feelings and I constantly feel like crying.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2017): You have wasted 9 years waiting for this guy to give you marriage and children. You have to know by now that it is not going to happen with him. I assume you have discussed this with him. If you haven't do it today and ask him where he sees you two going. If he isn't on the same page as you it may be time to cut him loose.
Remember maternal fertility starts to drop rapidly after age 30.
A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (2 July 2017):
A person could also say that you don't recognize his need to not be married and have kids... You may be with the wrong person.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (1 July 2017):
 When was the last time you had a discussion about what you both want for your futures - not just "marriage and babies, yay or nay?", but overall goals?
He needs to mentally recover because having kids takes a major toll on even the healthiest people. Weddings are also expensive, even on a budget, so that can test relationships too.
Have a proper discussion and find out if you're on the same page or not. Please don't whine about it if he isn't sure or try to persuade him into changing his mind down the line.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious + ♥, writes (1 July 2017):
 Have you actually discussed marriage and children with him? Is that where he sees your long term future?
It is natural to want to get married and to want children. However, You need to decide how long you are prepared to wait. You two need to talk.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2017): You're still soooo young. Relax you got at least 10 years. Make the most of this time and enjoy life.
Also do you really want kids with someone who has mental health issues? Take the time to consider these things!!!
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