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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 8 months now and I am absolutely in love with him. When the relationship first started, I was a little bit freaked out because he was so obssessed with me, and expressed his fear of losing me to another guy. I assured him that everything was going to be ok, but I didn't have very strong feelings for him at the time. Everything has been great but now it seems that the places are flipped; I am the obssessed one and he doesn't care for me anymore. He tells me that his feeling have changed and although he cares about me, it is not in the same way. We broke up, then got together, then broke up, and now were back together. I feel like I shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who doesn't really care about me, but I can't bring myself to being without him. He recently admitted that he was only with me because he felt bad that he was hurting me like this, knowing the bad relationship pasts I have had. He doesn't want to be with me, but doesn't want to hurt me. Either way for me, it's a lose lose. He also has lied to me, and started smoking weed, something that I am really against (which he is fully aware of). This is now another issue. He says he doesn't want to be with me if I'm going to be his mom. However I can't ignore the fact that he is doing something that I don't agree with, and I can't just sit here and watch him do this to me and himself. I really want this to work because I am still deeply in love with him and he has already hurt me so much, but I still want to be with him. He also says he wants to remain friends no matter what happens, but I was never just his friend and I don't know how to be just a friend because I feel like every time I see him it will always be in my mind no matter what, making it awkward. please help me!
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female
reader, treats  +, writes (17 October 2008):
I think what the Missy Missouri's answer is PERFECT! it's exactly what you should do!! good luck!
A
female
reader, Missy Missouri  +, writes (17 October 2008):
 From how it sounds it seems as if you know what you should do, but just can't bring yourself to do it. I'm afraid to say your relationship with him is already over. As soon as one partner doesn't want to be in the relationship then it's time to call it a day. Get out of it now and keep your head held high no matter how much it hurts inside. As you have stated he's already lied to you and told you to your face he's not into it anymore, why would you want his pity? Kick him to the curb, you would be better off alone for a while than to carry on treating yourself like this. Keep your dignity and show everyone you don't need someone to just put up with you. You want,deserve and will find someone who craves you as much as you crave them and it will be equal. You're worth more than to be a part of this relationship. Do your best to push yourself forward and take each day as it comes. The best revenge is to be fully happy in yourself and be content.I bet that once you split up, in a few months you will see him smoking his dope and getting caught up in his own lies and walk on past and think to yourself what a lucky escape you had! Be confident in yourself! x
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