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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi, ok me and this guy talked for a really long time even though he was already in a relationship. He told me that he wanted to be with me and he loved me, not long after he ended it with his girl. I thought that he would come to me but obviously that was the last thing on his mind...when I confronted him about it he said he wasn't ready for a girlfriend so I respected his wishes. We still talked intimately and had an intimate friendship. When he went back to his girl I began to wonder if I was just the girl with the pleasure for him. I felt very hurt and like I was nothing more to him than his toy, but he still told me that he cared very much for me and that we was going to be together.....that turned out to be a lie also. That was a month ago and I still find myself thinking of him and wishing I was with him, why ? I miss him so much and I still care for him even though he put me through hell, I was wanting to know why I feel this way and is it normal ? I don't want to feel this way cause I don't want to get hurt again so how do I stop ? What's wrong with me ? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (19 October 2006):
 Ok stop beating yourself up - everyone makes mistakes and this guy is your mistake. Firstly, he never planned for you to be no.1 girlfriend...you were the bit on the side...sorry to be harsh, I don't mean to be nasty but that is how he saw the situation. If he wanted to be with you then obviously you pair would be coupled up now. However, you shouldn't feel bad about it all - think of it positively. Thank goodness you didn't waste your time and energy on this guy - he is hardly fabulous boyfriend material is he? Lets see, he was chatting you up when he had a girlfriend and then he was doing it again when he had another girlfriend...feel sorry for those girls. I wouldn't wish to be with him - he has the propensity to cheat and he manipulates and plays women to get what he wants? Do you really want to be saddled with such a loser? Perhaps not eh?
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