A
female
age
36-40,
*..cat...
writes:i was with my boyfriend for 6 weeks. we were madly in love. i thought he was the one. i still do. he was kind of off with me for a few days. then he said he thought he was ready for a relationship, but he wasn't. he said he has too much baggage from his ex.he begged me to stay friends with him, said he couldnt bare losing me completely. he said he loves me but we should just be friends. i still love him, im trying to be friends with him in the hope that ill be there when hes ready. i dont know whether im waisting my time or not? he wanted us to get together, wanted to meet my parents and wanted me to meet his son, he was in control of the relationship and then he just changed his mind. we get on pretty well as friends, but it breaks my heart sometimes that he doesnt want more. has anyone any advice whether i should stick around and see what happens with him?? do you think he loves me?
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male
reader, somewhat_anonymous  +, writes (18 August 2007):
Good plan.
A
female
reader, ...cat... +, writes (18 August 2007):
...cat... is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for d advice!!!
im going 2 stay friends with him, but only friends!! hes not getting any perks out of it!! im going 2 move on, just accept that wer in different places at d moment. sumday he mite b ready and i mite feel d same, but im not goin 2 waste my life waiting on him!!! il b his friend regardless cuase we get on well!! thank u xxx
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A
female
reader, Oblivia  +, writes (18 August 2007):
 These things hurt. It doesn't matter whether it has been weeks or months; if you have fallen for him it will be painful anyhow. I'm sorry to say though, that I don't think he loves you as much as you love him. And baggages from ex:s can be really heavy. Is she also the mother of his son? I think he thinks a lot of you, that he really found you a good person, but that he is not emotionally ready to let himself commit in love with someone new right now. It is unlikely he will get back with his ex for long, these things seldom work since the brake up mostly happen for a reason. And does she really want him back? When he is done with his past he might come around later, but my advice for you is to not wait around for that. You will only waste your time and you should instead work on letting your heart free. If the day comes when he really has gotten rid of the ex-baggage and is ready to commit with you, then you can take it from there. If you then still is available and feel the same for him as you do now.To release your heart and not waiting around is also the most probable way to have him back in the end. Not that you should think too much about that, but waiting around will not increase his interest in you and doesn't give him any reason to deal with his ex to set himself free at heart. If he can, he will probably just continue as usual, having you around but not commit. Don't put your precious heart through that.Wish you all the best, keep us updated.
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A
male
reader, somewhat_anonymous +, writes (18 August 2007):
It is only six weeks, you may have strong feelings, but you don't really know him all that well in that period of time to say you were madly in love. Most relationships where that kind of language is used from the early stages usually end just as fast.
That being said, it doesn;t mean you cannot present your case and make him change his mind, but ultimately you know he'll have to agree to it too. Give it an honest shot if you think it is possible, but if it doesn't work out, you cannot wait for him forever.
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