A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I've recently started dating a man who seems to be very nice, very quiet but very respectful and thoughtful. He seems to really care for me and want to spend time. My concern is that he never asks questions about me even though I ask him. I have asked about his marriage, divorce, job, friends, family etc... He will freely answer but never asks me in return. I took him out for his birthday, he never asked me when mine was, he has never asked about my family or where I'm from or what I even do for work. Any thoughts?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2008): I was just re-reading the transcript of the Starr report...and Monica Lewinsky said that Clinton never asked any questions about her. That hit me, because I was involved with someone who'd tell me he loved me...but never asked about me.
I was so ga-ga that I filled in the blanks myself. If I knew then what I know now, I would have known he was a narcissist from the first phonecall. He has a new girlfriend, and even rom a distance, I see him doing and saying the most insulting things. But I don't know the woman personally, so it's not my place to warn her.
But I do warn anyone...if he doesn't ask...try one of the narcissism checklists. I did...and the man in question had, LITERALLY, 19 out of 20 characteristics!!
Sorry.
I was bummed out to read Monica saying the same thing.
BTW, Monica and I weren't seeing the same guy....;-)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo, I don't think its about sex. He calls me about 4 times a day if we don't see each other and it seems he doesn't make a move unless I give him the okay. Most of the time I initiate it as he seems shy. He was a marine but I dont' know if that has any effect.
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A
male
reader, blaz£  +, writes (23 July 2007):
 he seems very wrapped up in himself.there are methods you can use to get past it but dont get wrapped up in his problems to much and dont allow him to go on like that.give him little hints, as in when he asks are you ok say well...not reli. then go into that.he does sound very wrapped up in himself, he cares about you but is wrapped up in his own problems.btw this is a verry far conclusion lol but just a chancee...mabye and i am not taking the mick.phsycopaths are people who are wrapped up in there own feelings. most are not violent but they only care about themselfs... that is a veryy far off conclusion to your problem but remember there are people out there that ar phsycopaths. find out if he had A.D.D (Attention Defecite Dissorder) when he was younger. anyway good luck ok? and dont worry to much about that phsycopatht thing it is more of a distant idea then a truth.bring your problems up more, all the best.xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2007): I dated a guy like that too once, and the warning bells went off in my head. Turns out they were justified...he was just playing me for sex.If a man doesn't care enough to ask, he just doesn't care. You're not a human to him, just a human sex toy, and he can't be honest enough to be upfront about it.It's possible I'm wrong, but I don't think so....gentlemenly behaviour is just a way to cover up their intentions to throw you off.Good Luck.
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