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female
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anonymous
writes: I broke up with my boyfriend six months ago. It was my decision, he was upset about it but we were still on decent terms. A week ago he left a message saying his father was really sick and that it did not look too good and then he said some things that let me know that he is still upset and bitter about the breakup....but he had never said those kind of things before. I am shocked by his outburst but I am putting it down to the stress that he is feeling because he might lose his dad. I am considering calling him back to call him on what he said. The other thing I could do is let it go because of the stress he is under right now. I do not want him back as a boyfriend but still care. Which course of action might be better. Any replies appreciated.
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female
reader, jng23 +, writes (8 November 2006):
Just talk about it with him. A lot of people say things they really don't mean sometimes
A
female
reader, rhythmandblues2  + ♥, writes (5 November 2006):
 Not knowing what exactly it was that your ex said to you, I would do the latter and let it go....he is still hurting over your breakup or he would not have said those things, he needed to tell you how he felt to get it off his chest so that he would feel better I guess....the fact that he called to let you know about his father means that he thought you might still care and want to know in case you could offer him some emotional support...he needs to know you care at this difficult time in his life, but be careful you do not send mixed signals that you want him back as a boyfriend when you don't....during a quiet moment you might open a discussion about the things he said to you if he does not bring it up again, I would not fight about it, but maybe you could say something to address his concerns about the subject what ever it is....sometimes the way to get closure on a relationship that is over is to state what it is you like about the person and that you hope they will be able to find another relationship that makes them happier than they were with you.
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A
female
reader, Xena +, writes (5 November 2006):
ok basically you CAN be there for him but you must know that honesty really is the best policy. So ... you call him back and u TELL him that u want to be there for him because u still care about him AS A FRIEND ONLY , you say you have your own reasons why you had to break up with him but he must understand that u are not going to get back with him , tell him this and say you really wouldnt want to hurt him anymore as its not fair on him under the circumstances with his dad being ill u wouldnt want it to get worse!! i promise u tell him this and u can be there for him but ONLY IF u say. Do you honestly want me there if i cant 'BE' with u in that way? tell him he needs to think about it . He doesnt souond like a strong character so u have to be delicate but be honest and im telling u , u cant go wrong!
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