A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I'm in my late thirties and been with my husband for 16 years but he wants oral sex most of the time (or anal which he says he doesn't like but he tries because I like it, I've told him I don't). He gets oral a lot but I would like a change. He thinks because I get the foreplay before it's ok He gets grumpy when I suggest I don't want to all the time. At the moment it's about 80% of the time he gets it but wants it all the time now. I thought it was about getting pregnant again but he's had the snip 3 years ago. It's isn't a normal thing in a marriage is it???????????
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2011): your husband is selfish if getting oral "only" 80% of the time is so dissatisfying to him that he gets grumpy and pushy with you.
To him sex isn't about intimacy and sharing a bonding moment, if it was he would care about your enjoyment. But instead he only cares about using you as a means to getting his physical release. And it just so happens that oral is what gives him the most effective release (as it does for many guys).
when one partner gets angry at the other over sex and doesn't care if the other is enjoying it, it means that sex is no longer about love or intimacy it's just using their partner as a masturbation tool to achieve their own physical release. you might as well just leave him to jerk off by himself.
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