A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone my fwb and me were talking last night he said he would like a relationship with me but he is scared of starting over again as he came out of a long term relationship nearly two year ago we both agreed we would be good together as we are both very laidback about things and into the same sort of stuff how do I help him see he doesn't have to be scared thank you Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2012): I take it you would like to be in a relationship with him rather than this FWB thing. If he is put off experiencing life because things might not work out he will do nothing. If you are up for it, say 'let's go for it'. Fear can stop you moving forward.
A
male
reader, Kyle007  +, writes (22 January 2012):
My opinion of FWB relationships is that you are doing step 3 without doing steps 1 and 2 first. Because steps 1 and 2 are missing, the relationship is weak.
You want steps 1 and 2, the dating, the romance.
He needs to get over his fears. No one has any business being in a relationship if they are afraid of the breakup. The vast majority of relationships END.
Its just like you have no business gambling if you are afraid to lose your money.
Have the talk like CaringGuy said.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (22 January 2012):
All you can do is sit down with him and talk with him about his fears. You need to tell him how you feel, and he needs to be open. It has to be a big talk about where he's going.
If nothing comes of a big talk, then I think you'll have to accept that he's not ready for commitment, and move on. It would ultimately be mad of you to wait around for someone who doesn't want more.
Have a big talk with him, give him a little time, then move on if nothing comes of it.
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