A
female
age
,
*hSoConfused
writes:Hi all. I'm 43, hubby 42, married 17yrs, together 23yrs. I'm at the end of my tether. He is obsessed with his sport and spends most of his free time playing. if he's not playing it, he's watching it or surfing in on the net. He doesn't help out much at home. We have 2 kids who he doesn't interact with much. He is controlling in that he puts his sport appointments on the calendar without consultation and I'm supposed to stay home with the kids doing housework while he's out all weekend. We both work full time by the way, me days, him nights. When we fight, he sulks and we then go into these silences. The current silence began at Christmas and is still going strong. This last weekend I finally began asserting myself and he wasn't impressed. Said things needed to change. I asked him what he wanted to change and it's the same old, same old. I really don't have feelings for him any more and am confused what to do next. My feeling is to separate but I'm frightened of taking that first step. Any advice?
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2007): i know where your coming from,same thing happened to me,he became 40 and that was it,sport was his life and everything else went out the window,he even turned round and said sport came first and i was second best.well when that was said i just about had enough,i stupidly had a affair with someone because of no attention from him.i knew in the end i had to finish the marriage as nothing would change.i have been on my own now and have been for 15 months,it was the best thing i ever done,it was hard to begin with.very lonely,but really thats life you are living now,alone,if your not happy and he wont change,then i suggest to make the break and live the life you deserve.
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