A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:OK!..so me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 months.Hes my first real boyfriend n i think i love him.For our first month anniversary we didn't eraly do anything special just hung out all day with each other.I was expecting maybe some little gift such as a single rose or something from him(nothing to much or expensive) but when christmas came around i was expecting like a little gift or something.I got him some personal engraved things saying things like "our first christmas" and "i love you"...but what i got from him was ....NOTHING! I personally would't have cared what he had gotten me as long as it was from his heart and that he thought of me.But now i feel like he didn't even try.I feel like i wasn't even worth it to him.Im afraid to say something about it because i really like him and i dont want to sound greedy or anything..SHOULD I SAY SOMETHING OR NOT?At first our relationship was kickin off well .And now i only see him like every-other-day or so.He still talks to his ex and still "hangs out" with her as well.He even went out to breakfest with her on morning while we are dating.I found that out from a close friend of ours and he admitted it to me but when i asked him if he was ever going to tell me he quickly said no.I know his ex personally but we dont really get along much anymore since i started going out with him but because i only see him like every-other-day i feel like he may be cheating on me (possably with her)and he sweres hes not but yet i still catch him in some lies and i confront him and he always turns it on me and makes me feel guilty.WHAT SHOULD I DO?
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anniversary, christmas, his ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (7 January 2009):
 OK, with that added information I think we can positively say that he is not over her. And quite possibly he is not as into you as you are into him.
FA
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all..and i understand where yall are coming from.And i have told him my feelings but it feels like it does not even matter to him because he still does it. And im not trying to have him stop talking/seeing his ex or anything but just to back down a little and show it more torwds me compared to his ex. after all him and his ex did EXCHANGE x-mas gifts to eachother on x-mas eve!
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (6 January 2009):
First off let me restate one of my old saws. Guys are emotionally retarded. You are going to have to explain to him that you like presents for every occasion. This is all new terriitory for you and you are having trouble separating your dream boy from the real boy (with baggage) that you are dealing with. Aatually the boy who thinks to get a present for a 1 month anniversary may not exist. You are also connecting the ex factor to the lack of presents problem. More likely they are completely separate problems. You also are showing a shocking lack of trust for a 2 month old relationship. ie using your friend network to spy on hm.
So what should you do? First communicate let him know what you like and what you don't like. Second give him some space to clean up his baggage. Any real long term relaationship is based on trust. If he has to be interogated every time you meet he will stop coming around. Third make sure you both know the rules / definition of your relationship. FA
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