A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together 4 about 2 1/2 years. Im very in love with him but he doesnt take me or the relationship seriously.He doesnt pay enough attention to my needs and I have emotional needs.I know he loves me but he doesnt show me the way I need him to show me. How do you suggest I get through to him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (17 July 2007):
 First off, I agree with "Been There Done That" and "Jonty" both. I'm not going to say what they already stated, but what I will add is this, if you have already told him how you feel and IF you are not a "clingy" type person who must hear "I Love You" every hour of the day because of your own insecurities, and he is not letting you know how he feels about you or gives you the time of day...then either he is taking you for granted or he is not "really" in love with you. Just because you have been in a relationship for over 2 yrs does not mean that "he" loves you. What does he prove to you that he loves you? What has he done for you that says "I Love You"? Does he tell you? daily? weekly? at all? Do you tell him? Sometimes, and I agree with Jonty, it does take a separation if it needs to come to that...key word there...and if it does, and he truly wants to be with you and realizes he screwed up because of his big mistake, then he will come back and if he doesn't...then that basically means he really wasn't in love with you and he feels that that is just to much to do in the relationship, which it totally is not! In other words, that's to much trouble. And we ALL should love, respect and care for the person who means so much in our lives, if we don't, then why are we in it?Good luck to you and best wishes in your relationship.How else do we keep a relationship alive? We tell our partner every day that we love them and we show it as much as we can daily. If not, we will and do feel as we mean nothing in it and it over spills onto us, and then eventually could lead into hatred towards the other.
A
male
reader, Jonty  +, writes (16 July 2007):
 Great answer from 'Been there done it' (great name too). Most people after a while take things for granted, e.g. people are so touchy feely when they first go out, but after about 6 months this stops, because we take for granted the person is going to be there.It sounds like your boyfrined is taking you for granted. I recommend a small break in the relationship (you are still together as a couple, just spending time apart). This will bring it back home to him how much you mean to him (well it will if he loves you). Once he realises he has taken you for granted, let him know that if he does it again there will be an indefinite break! This should have the desired effect, as it did when my girlfriend did it to me!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2007): Do you pay attention to his needs too? I think he`s got his hands full.
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A
female
reader, BEEN THERE DONE IT +, writes (16 July 2007):
 Hi there hun,
You have been with him for 2 1/2 years you say you know he loves you but he does not give you the attention you need...well to be honest babes if you don't tell him what your needs are then he will never know, you need to tell him what it is you would like him to do, but don't be high maintenance here if he loves you and you know it then be content with what you have....
We sometimes take each other for granted don't fall into this trap babes, love and cherrish what you have
Hope this has helped you darling, good luck
Love Donna xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2007): I would sit down with him and explain how i feel and explain that the relationship means two people and and their needs. Explain that after 2 1/2 years the relationship in your eyes should be closer and the emotional side of it should be tended to as much as the physical. You should be aiming for best friends as well as lovers.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (16 July 2007):
 Tell him, and keep telling him until he does understand your feelings.
xxxxxxx
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