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He didn't kiss me, is he interested???

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Question - (17 December 2010) 5 Answers - (Newest, 18 December 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *ora22 writes:

Hi, I started a new job in an office in July and I used to sit in front of this guy and we used to talk like small talk and then I moved desks and didn't see him for a long time. Until he asked one of my male friends if I was seeing someone and if I was going to the Christmas party. this was in November so obviously he still remembered me although we hadn't talk for a while. Things I was engaged and my friend told him but things weren't going great with my boyfriend at the time so when I found out he thought I was "fit" as he said to my friend, I started sending him casual emails, and we started talking via email every day. We would talk everyday via email and sometimes he would come over my desk just to say hi. Everyone thought he was interested in me but I had a boyfriend so we never talked anything about it. At the day of the Christmas party, we were together all night, he never left me even when I said "go talk t other girls" we never went.

We drunk a bit and we went dancing and things got really hot and then he whispered in my ear "I really wanna kiss you" and I said "me too" but he said "we can't it's wrong" which I accepted but then we kept dancing and touching each other and then we went outside and I talked to him and said things with my boyfriend weren't great and I was probably gonna break up with him. When we came back to the club we kept dancing and then I said "I really need to kiss you" and he just said "better not" and we didn't kiss. We kept dancing and touching and he kept saying how gorgeous I am and when we left he hold my hand all the way to the car asking if I was OK. We rented a room in a hotel with 3 other people and we slept next to each other and he didn't try anything but he fell asleep holding my hand and cuddling. I left before he woke up so we didn't talk. I broke up with my boyfriend at the weekend but because we're living together it's a hard situation so we still live in the same house.

On Monday I told him what had happened with my boyfriend hoping he would make a move but instead he kept giving me relationship advice and when I tried to bring up what happened with us he kept trying to avoid it and change subject. I told him I'm moving out soon and we keep talking and he is the one to email me first and ask me to go on lunch with him but he just doesn't seem interested in me now. I keep trying to flirt with him and giving him clues that I want him but he doesn't correspond... What do you think

View related questions: broke up, christmas, drunk, engaged, flirt

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2010):

Take it slow. Let things go with him until you are out of your boyfriend's home and settled on your own. To him it might seem as if you want to launch yourself from one relationship to another seemlessly. And as, for now, you are still in the same accomodation with your ex it looks complicated. He sounds like a nice guy. Didn't want to get involved with you as you were with someone. So to sum up. Get yourself totally out of your current relationship, let the dust settle, don't seem in a rush to move things along with him. Wait a while, you may pick up the threads in time if it's meant to be.

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A female reader, dora22 United Kingdom +, writes (18 December 2010):

dora22 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I would never cheat on anyone, I was a bit drunk when we did that, I did regret it afterwards and wish I had never even met him but I developed feelings for this guy and broke with my fiance because it's not fair on him. I do understand what you're saying and I appreciate your honesty so I think at this instance I'll just have to end up alone. Thank you very much for your help...

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A female reader, dora22 United Kingdom +, writes (18 December 2010):

dora22 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I would never cheat on anyone, I was a bit drunk when we did that, I did regret it afterwards and wish I had never even met him but I developed feelings for this guy and broke with my fiance because it's not fair on him. I do understand what you're saying and I appreciate your honesty so I think at this instance I'll just have to end up alone. Thank you very much for your help...

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A male reader, Finn United States +, writes (18 December 2010):

Ya, sorry to say, but I wouldn't be interested in a girl who was trying to hook up with me while she was engaged. Even if she broke it off with her fiance soon after.

A woman who is trying to set up their next relationship before ending the current one is obviously unhappy in the one relationship that should matter most to her, her relationship with herself....

My advice: spend some time courting yourself...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2010):

I'm sorry to say girly but some guys don't like cheaters. I'm not saying your bad. When things are bad at home other options can be very tempting. I understand. But if your engaged to a guy and your going to be up on your co-worker, he may be thinking what's to stop you from doing the same to him? Some say once a cheater always a cheater. I hope this is not the case though. Best wishes.

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