A
female
age
30-35,
*ngelc
writes:ok. so me and my current boyfriend have dated before. we were together almost 9 months and he cheated on me. now him n this girl are over and me and him are back together. we are almost back to dating for 2 months... but now i have serious trust issues. wut should i do? i mean, i love this guy to death. he's my first and only love, but im so scared of being hurt again. i suck at confronting anyone with my feelings so usually i try not to bring anything up or talk about the past. but this time we are dating it actually feels like he really doesnt wanna lose me n tht he means it wen he says he loves me. but should i believe him or should i still keep myself cautious?help? pls? n thank you :)
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female
reader, cutiepie14 +, writes (16 February 2011):
 My friend had this same problem, i'm gunnu say he could just be holding on to you until someone else comes along.
You need to confront him, if he gets defensive, then he might be lying.
Trust is key,if you don't trust him you need to end it.
hope this helps
A
female
reader, angelc +, writes (14 February 2011):
angelc is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanks so much everyone for the advice :) n yes it has caused alot of trust issues. its been very hard to believe him wen he says he loves me even tho im sure he's sincere. im jus so scared of being hurt again. but ive realised tht im not only very close to him, im very close and loved by his fmily as well. im jus hoping to find my happily ever after with this guy.
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A
female
reader, chocoholicforever +, writes (14 February 2011):
you're setting yourself up to be hurt again either because he may very well cheat again, or even if he doesn't, your feelings of suspicion may eat away at you for a long time.
But if you choose to be with him, then I think you should keep your guard up for now. Trust once broken has to be earned, not given freely.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): Shame on you if you fool me once, shame on me if you fool me twice? I always feel people deserve a second chance but how much do you think he's actually learned you're not a girl to be cheated on?I don't know how much time passed between him breaking up with missus number 2 and getting back together with you but I would have two major concerns to put to you. Did you give him time to consider how much he really hurt you? I mean, did he do something before you got together to show he's changed, did you give him at least a few months to think about it?Secondly, and this might hurt, but did you give him a real amount of time to get over this last relationship? How sure are you that he's not rebounding and just searching for something familiar whilst he's hurting?There's no hard and fast rule, but I think as long as your confident you've allowed time for the above and your confident you can walk away the second time? There's no reason to break up, just take your time enjoying the relationship and rebuilding the trust. And you will need time to rebuild trust, it's a really difficult thing to get back once it's broken.:)Oh and if you're not sure you can stop him abusing your trust in future, if he cheats again, it might be worth leaving, otherwise you might find you have difficulty trusting anyone which is a lot worse than just not being able to trust him.
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