A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Guys: Would you ever open up and tell a girl who you met on a night out something very personal about your family life? For example one of your parents being seriously ill/getting a divorce and the effect it has on you and the lifestyle because of it?I ask since I met a guy last night and when we were talking I brought up my family, how I was seeing them this weekend and miss being around them because we're so close. He seemed happy for me and then told me things about his family life, I was surprised what he had to deal with and what he was going through! It was something I thought was so personal because we only met that night! ...But he looked so broken inside, when looking at him and hearing him talk I knew he felt it was his fault and wanted someone to talk to. I was so surprised he told me any of that! But was just flattered he felt he could.My mum and friends said that he must of felt something being with me, or liked me which is why he could confide in me. Something along those lines, because apparently most guys would never really tell someone that, not their closest friends.. Let alone a stranger they met that night?! Is this true, I thought he was talking about his family cause I mentioned mine. But apparently guys would not just open up about something personal with just anyone?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2011): Yes, if you open up about your family like you did to him, people will most likely share something about their own family. It's easier to talk to complete strangers (why bartenders and hairdressers hear just about everything imaginable) because there is nothing at stake.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2011): I guess it must have been uncomfortable for you since you are asking this question...or you need validity to check if this is appropriate or acceptable behavior. In either case, this is something most people would want. Imagine if he had NOT opened up to you and was closed off, even a little distant. Well, to answer your question from a social perspective, some girls would find this behavior creepy, a bit too forward, too fast paced, and unattractive. You don't even know the guy yet he is opening up to you like he knows you so well and that you can comfort him. It comes off as a bit needy and exhibits a lack of control over his emotions and control over his own life if he needs to pour to you, rather than his friends. He must not have anyone to console to. Do you want to be his high school guidance counselor or his lover? In the other case, you should accept how open he is with his feelings with you. It means he feels a connection with you to open up to you so quickly and well. He already holds you as a possibly important person in his life which is why he told you this personal information. This shows he is making an effort to getting to know you and for you to have a chance to get to know him. You shouldn't take this situation too lightly, but not take it too personally either. Be cautious. What kind of creep opens up to a person so fast or what kind of a gentleman to be so open with his personal emotions with me? You be the judge.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 November 2011): It might be a combination of a couple of things, yes, he may have felt a connection with you, and thought you would be a good person to talk to, but it may have also been that he was quite desperate to talk to anyone, and perhaps felt more comfortable discussing it with a stranger that he likely won't see again, rather than close friend. This is actually pretty common for some people, who don't want their friends to know they aren't coping, but still want to share their troubles with someone. The other thing is, if any alcohol was involved, this naturally makes people more willing to chat about their problems with random strangers!
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (15 November 2011):
 Maybe he just needed to get it out and since you were open about your family, he wanted to do the same.
I'm thinking he felt you were a person he could be open around.
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