A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:So i am separated from my husband. And there is this guy i have been talking to and seeing. We have been friends for over 2yrs. We used to talk about everything and we grew such a connection while we were friends (all this happening while i was still married). All the while each of us had feelings for each other but never said/acted upon them because i was married. So when my husband and i finally separated i grew enough courage to tell this guy how i felt and he reciprocated. And we have been hanging out romantically ever since. He tells me all the time that he has strong feelings for me and wants to find someone to settle down with etc... so finally tonight i told him hqd had strong feelings for him and might even be in love with him. I asked if he felt the same. And although his answer was not negative he did not tell me he is in love with me. I feel so dumb now. I also kind of freaked out on him. Then he asked to change the convo and we tried but it was so awkward. So i told him to call me later and that i was going to go. I havent heard from him since and he wont return my texts. I know he cares about me. He tells me all the time, and i even got the vibe he loves me, otherwise i wouldnt have told him how i feel. Im so confused. What do i say or do?Background info: we have both been in serious relationships in the past and have been cheated on and hurt... and never expected to be where we are with the feelings we have for each other
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female
reader, Trinklett  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 Give him time to put his thoughts, feelings together so that he can make a decision. I think he likes you, but the pace is too fast for him. When he comes back, don't say anything about this, leave it up to him. You've said enough. The ball is now in his court - whatever the outcome, you try to play along.
A
male
reader, soon567 +, writes (16 November 2011):
This may be going to fast, but we want things we cannot have. He may have wanted you just as you were, part time and now youre coming to him full time. This could have ended it.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 I guess maybe when the conversation took a turn and became awkward he got a bit afraid and now he has backed out and is unsure about how he feels. Maybe he does not feel he is in love with you just quite yet. You are not long out of a marriage so these things are always best if you take your time. He has been hurt in the past so maybe the love word just frightened him a little. Give him some time to think things through without contacting him. Maybe leave it a week or two with no contact and if he does not answer then drop him a text and ask him what the story is and where do you stand. I think he might just need some space to come to terms with things. Good luck
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