A
female
age
26-29,
*eShouldntHide2006
writes:Okay, I've been friends with this guy for a good few years now, I'll call him B. I've recently broken up with my previous boyfriend of 7 months, things just weren't working out. I hug all of my guy friends and all of them know a simple hug for a quick few seconds is my sign of friendship. B used to pick me up and carry me or swing me around and go the extra limit. I assume its just to show who is toughest! B invited me around his house a couple of weeks ago, as we sat down to watch a film he put his arm around me and slowly it progressed to lying down cuddling. I assumed it was all fine until i discussed it with my friend, she was shocked, apparetly friends shouldnt cuddle and that it means one of us wants more. I used to like this guy and he is stunningly beautiful but i've been there and done that and don't plan on going back there. I ignored this and assumed it was a friendly cuddle, i went back around his house the other day and we cuddled again, it seemed more intimate, at one point his hand was on my bum and i didnt realise till it slipped into the pocket, and he said something. He picked me up and placed me on his lap with my legs wrapped around his back and he cuddled into me. At one point i'm pretty sure i may have felt something pop up to say hello but i could be mistaken. If he wanted to kiss me he had his chance then but every time our faces were close he'd move his face away... Whats he playing at, we are just friends aren't we? I dont like him, but i could consider giving us a go because we're well matched. I just need to know whether to say anything to him or not?Thanks,WeShouldntHide2006 Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (9 January 2012):
 you straddled him
you lay down and cuddle
he puts his hand on your bum
you both clearly surpassed the friendly hug
and now he's had second thoughts and put the brakes on it.
and the "I can't flirt with other girls" tells he knows alot about himself and says he's not ready to settle down
what it means...
you both crossed the friend line and now have to decide if you want to keep crossing it or go back
if you opt to go back DO IT NOW... don't keep crossing the line
friends do not lay on the couch and cuddle up to watch a movie... do you do this with your girlfriends?
A
female
reader, WeShouldntHide2006 +, writes (30 December 2011):
WeShouldntHide2006 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks for replying.
I now have an update, he messaged me last night saying that we should hug less intimatly, which is fair enough. He could have left it at that but went on to say that he thought about kissing me. But decided that short term it would be good, long term it would be bad.
He went on to explain why long term it would be bad:
1. People would think he liked me while i dated my ex.
2. It would ruin our friendship.
While i was thinking of what to reply, he said:
3. I couldnt flirt with girls.
Shortly after he said night and left. Just after he had said that.
I'm now stuck as to what this all means? Should i confront him about it all or just leave him to talk to me next.
About whether i like him... He is beautiful and we are well matched, i trust him a lot. It could work out, it could fail. I suppose i do like him yes otherwise i wouldnt have let the cuddling get as intimate as it did. But why did he?
Thanks. x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2011): A hug between friends is fine, but what is happening with B is not just a friendly cuddle. If you don't like him in that way, stop acting this way with him, because it seems he wants more and you will only end up hurting him.
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A
female
reader, WeShouldntHide2006 +, writes (29 December 2011):
WeShouldntHide2006 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionany help please? i suppose i should say i straddeled him when he put me on his lap.. but not sexually. i cant ever imagine this guy trying anything sexual with anyone, especially me. x
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