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Found a condom in my BF's wallet...but we don't use condoms!!

Tagged as: Dating, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 April 2011) 8 Answers - (Newest, 19 April 2011)
A female United States age 36-40, *illy jean writes:

my boyfriend and i have been togther for 3 years and i found a comdom in his wallet we don't use comdoms i ask him about it and he said he was going to use it on me i don't beleve him what sould i do

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2011):

What was the expiration? I think the expiration date is 5 years, and they are sold soon after manufacture. It would make no sense for your BF to have a condom to "use on you" at any other time than in the beginning of your relationship, right? So if he bought it 3 years ago, the max it would have left on the expiration date is 2 years. Anything more, and he bought it after you first met, and I would be more suspicious in that case.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2011):

i also have same situation as you with my ex. we never used condom and suddenly i found a condom in his wallet. ill ask him and he say that a friend give it to him which i know who the friend is and i believe it. 1 month after the condom was gone but i trust him and try not to be negative thinking and later i found out that he was making out with some other girl. i was like..huh, so stupid of me and i left him for that.

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A female reader, ToHereKnowsWhen Australia +, writes (18 April 2011):

ToHereKnowsWhen agony auntIt seems strange that he was going to use it on you when you don't use condoms. However, if there was something for him to hide, I am sure he could have hidden the condom in a lot better places than his wallet. Give him a fair go. If something is going wrong, you will soon find out. All the best.

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (18 April 2011):

dirtball agony auntAs a side note, never use a wallet condom. The heat from the body over time degrades the latex and they are basically worthless. Keeping condoms in your wallet is just asking for trouble if you ever end up using it.

I'd be willing to bet if you checked the expiration date it's well past usable anyway.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2011):

Unless there are any other reasons for suspecting that he is cheating on you then I wouldn't think too much about it.

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A male reader, Jmtmj Australia +, writes (18 April 2011):

Jmtmj agony auntBelieve what you want, but its a pretty standard thing for a guy to have in his wallet regardless and unless you've gone into his wallet into that particular compartment where you found it before over the years, then I wouldn't jump to conclusions.

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A male reader, mrg123 United Kingdom +, writes (18 April 2011):

mrg123 agony auntHmmm, im not convinced you should jump to conclusions with this one. There just isn't enough there in this one incident to make me feel suspicion is warranted. What he is saying could be true and frankly, even if I was in your relationship situation id probably carry one, not for use with somebody else but just in case my partner changed her mind. Now if you have other reasons for feeling something maybe going on then please share.

Otherwise I think there is a danger here of putting 2 to 2 and answering 5. Dont get me wrong, I can understand why you would BUT there are innocent, valid explanations, that is all I am saying.

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A male reader, Welsh Uncle Dave United Kingdom +, writes (18 April 2011):

Hold fire for the time being but keep an eye on things. Sounds suspicious to me.

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