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For two years our relationship has been cruising, parking, making out. I want more!

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 November 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 21 November 2008)
A female United States age 36-40, *stanie writes:

so...me and my boyfriend's relationship is becoming the same routine (he picks me up, we drive around, we park and talk, make out, and that's it) which is good but i like to do more like have sex. he wants me to wait for a while til we get our own place...but it's been 2 years and i don't know how much more i can take. what should i do?

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (21 November 2008):

Well considering you like spending quality time alone, you seem to be afraid to speak to him about anything.

After all this time did you not notice he was unhappy - or did you not ask him why he is unhappy?

You seem so think quality time is spent in silence.

If you can't even talk about your feelings together than that is not very good quality.

Good Luck!! xx

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A female reader, estanie United States +, writes (21 November 2008):

estanie is verified as being by the original poster of the question

estanie agony aunti don't care for dates or going out. i prefer to spend quality time alone together...so i talked to him last night and told him something needs to change and he says he can't make me happy because he is an unhappy person. should i have bit my tongue?

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A female reader, Stacy Trail United States +, writes (20 November 2008):

Stacy Trail agony auntI agree with TasteofIndia-- try driving SOMEWHERE, and going on a date outside the car. Walking around is another alternative. You can see a lot, talk, and it's quieter and more intimate, because you don't have to worry about all those other drivers:)

As an alternative to sex in the car, what about going to a hotel? You two could get really adventurous and drive to a weekend getaway in another town (it doesn't have to be far) and hole up in a hotel for a few days, just the two of you. It would break the routine, and be great therapy for your relationship, not to mention a lot of fun. Who knows what might happen ;)

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (20 November 2008):

So hang on, he never actually gets out of his car?

Why hasn't he taken you to restaurants, films, his place, your place?

If you just want sex then do it in the car.

If you want a relationship then ask to drive SOMEWHERE and then do some kind of activity when you get there.

Good Luck!! xx

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A female reader, TasteofIndia United States +, writes (19 November 2008):

TasteofIndia agony auntDo you want to do more physically or just spice up your routine? Do you two go on fun dates with each other? You need to take the reigns and buy some tickets to the zoo before you hang out and say, "today we're not just going to drive around, we're going to drive SOMEWHERE!".

I've definitely had my share of cruise-around-make-out-in-the-car boyfriends, but that was back in high school. If you are really 22-25 and your boyfriend is about the same age, my goodness! He needs to grow up a bit and get the heck out of the car and into a restaurant or theater or something!

Or, if sex is what you're after, couldn't you do the deed IN the car? That is what I call compromise.

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