A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I had my son when I was 19 as I was finishing my freshman year of college. My baby daddy was 26 and a total dead beat. We had dated for only a year.It's been five years since I gave birth and I'm getting married to the man I should've had my son with. Unfortunately, my baby daddy is making things much more difficult than they ought to be.He's been with this other girl for five years now (he cheated on me with her). They actually have a kid themselves and are about to have their second.The problem is that my wedding is in three weeks and my baby daddy is trying to make it to where our son won't be the ring bearer.What am I supposed to do about this situation?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2010): Is he trying to get his time with you son at the same time the wedding is, or is he trying to do something that will make the boy scared, or miss the event... what is he DOING?
A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (9 October 2010):
 Has the original man been active (or tried to be active) in raising his son? If so, he may feel threatened at seeing his son become involved in the new family, and want to maintain his connection to his kid.
If that's the case, you should try to reason with him about it. Try to address his concerns, and remember that the kid is his kid too, whatever happened between you.
If he has not tried to be connected, then he's just an ass. Bring your kid to the wedding and have a good time, and don't bother to explain it to the old boyfriend.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (9 October 2010):
 Surely he can't stop your son from being the ring bearer. He shouldnt be still trying to control you or the situation. Do you speak to his new girlfriend. Let her know what he's trying to do, then she may question him and want to know why it even bothers him to do this.
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