A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:We have been married for 4 months. Somehow my wife does not feel satisfied. She told me after I enquired several times, that I may be ejaculating prematurely, that is, our sex is for very short period. How can I solve this problem. Please advise.
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female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (17 February 2009):
 May I ask if you have spent any time in trying to pleasure her before you start intercourse? Only about one-third of all women actually achieve orgasm through penetrative sex alone (intercourse); the other two-thirds need some stimulation of their clitoris. Think of the clitoris as being analagous to your penis. If your penis isn't stimulated during sexual activity, would you reach orgasm? Most likely not. So your wife has the same nerves in her clitoris that you have in your penis. Figure out the best way to stimulate her there and you'll be getting somewhere.
May I also ask if your wife knows what an orgasm feels like; has she ever had one? If she does and she has, then she can show you what feels good to her.
You should not feel like a failure if she doesn't reach orgasm through sexual intercourse alone; consider it a challenge that you can have enjoyment in finding other ways.
There are ways to prolong an erection during intercourse; perhaps some of the male uncles can provide more insight there.
Above all, RELAX. Don't go into the encounter thinking too much about it. And I sincerely hope that she is not worried about it too, as too much thinking "I must have an orgasm, I must have an orgasm, I must have an orgasm" will certainly prevent her having one.
And I applaud you for being a considerate lover to your wife.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 February 2009): -two lines of attack spring to mind : lots of foreplay - buy toys etc. Get her to teach you how to touch her, taste her etc. the second line is learn techniques to control it - the Kegel? techniques are easiest I think. all about tightening the muscles at base of penis. look on the web for them. it happens a lot so please don't worry it will pass - you are doing something about it which is brilliant. if it does persist see a doc, he might prescribe viagra (I think?) or it might be caused by a medical condition.Star.x.
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