A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boy friend has a fantasie of me having both male and female sex organs, and he fantasizes' him preforming oral sex with the male organ, and also doing him from behind. Could this mean he is gay or bi and he's to embarrassed to say anything?? Please help.
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male
reader, Mr. Kuriosity +, writes (9 February 2011):
 He may have Bi-Tendencies but fantasizes with you because its safe. And "Fatherly Advices" question of "How do you feel about this?" is a good one.
If you are good with it and he is obviously good with you, (as he told you)realize it is a fantasy, a fantasy can be fulfilled if you are willing... try to find a way to suggest role playing, discretely, or with pictures of a couple in role reversal, use an online source to order adult toys, like a harness that holds a dildo and give him what he wants.
AGAIN only if your ok with this.
I wish you well with your situation, and hope you find the right outcome for you both.
A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (29 January 2011):
 I suppose you'll have to judge -- if your sex life is fulfilling, he's likely not gay. Bi perhaps.
Lots of couples never get to the point where they can share their fantasies. He's shown a remarkable level of trust by telling you something that the vast majority of men would consider to be a deep, dark secret. As PatientlyWaiting said, honour that trust by keeping that confidence, regardless of the outcome of your relationship.
As to where you go from here, FA is quite right to ask how you feel about it. If you're creeped out, that could be a deal breaker. If you're not, and are willing to explore ways to accommodate his fetish, then you can move on in your relationship. If the latter is the case, and he's not looking for something outside of the relationship with you, there's no problem is there? Labels won't be an issue.
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A
female
reader, PatientlyWaiting1 +, writes (29 January 2011):
Yes I would feel like he may be bi or completely gay and is trying to "appear" straight by having you as a girlfriend. Whatever you do, do not tell anyone about his comments because he is really trusting you with that information.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice + ♥, writes (29 January 2011):
 I wouldn't say he is too embarrassed if he shared that fantasy with you. I think the real important question here is how do you feel about it?
FA
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