A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello :)i have a really close friend, she visited me this summer and was always flirting and touching me (holding hands w/ interlocked fingers, kissing my cheek and nose, sitting on my lap, always wanting to cuddle, linking arms, resting head on shoulders etc, slapping my butt..) and says she loves me literally everytime we speak, and texts me that she misses me and has had dreams of me showing up at her door n stuff when we're not together. we've spoken everyday since she went back to europe like 4 months ago, online mostly, IM, or phone, as she lives in europe, and its always for hours (2 hours at least) that we talk. we were having a webcam convo once, and she drew a heart on a piece of paper, and wrote "my name + hers forever" on the paper, and i think i've fallen in love with this girl. But now, she's telling me about how she's in love with this guy, and she wants to tell him, and it was out of no where. I never talked about guys and she never did either, so it really shocked me. And so once she asked for my advice, and i played it off like im happy for her, and she shud tell him n not make the same mistake as me cuz i did that when i liked a guy, and since then the flirting n msgng is knda not the same, i mean we still talk a lot but its more friendly now, like 2 best friends, whereas b4 i felt as tho we were in a long distance relationship kinda thing.what do u think i shud do? cuz she keeps talking about this guy and how she wants to tell him but everytime the timing is off or someone else is there and blah blah blah. no one knows im bi, and so i can't tell her straight out that i like her. But do u think its possible she liked me b4 and due to my shitty response she kinda backed off...like do u think she was testing me??im so confused...thanks for your help :)
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best friend, flirt, kissing, long distance, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionso do you think that maybe i should cut down contact, not entirely, but lessen it? i mean i wouldn't stay in touch this much with someone who i saw as merely a friend, it would be like once a while.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2007): Quite simple problem really.
You got real close to this woman, more than friends. But she went back and the feeling died and matured into a deep friendship.
Be happy she's even talking to you when she has no real reason to. She's asking your advice.
But on the off chance she's cruel enough to test you in this way... tell her that you're sorry for acting like a jealous dick. That you are just adjusting to it all. Then offer her friendship... nothing more.
Better to have her as a friend, then not at all (believe me, as someone in love with a girl overseas who has to watch her go throguh boyfriend after boyfriend).
Flynn 24
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