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Do women get bored of sex with just one man??

Tagged as: Big Questions, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 December 2007) 16 Answers - (Newest, 23 August 2017)
A male United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

Got a question.

I've been married 12 yrs and something is bothering me. I have been my wifes 1st i devirginized her ive been with other women but i feel like shes bored of the sex we have only because we have been together 14 years with the same man.

I mean i'm happy but i feel that in back of her mind is a what other kind of sex is out there ive asked other women my situation and they say man as for them selves they couldnt imagine having sex with just one guy for 14 years. And thats what bothers me, to think may be my wife thinks the same. We have sex maybe once a month.Is there other women that think that or feel the same boredness of being with one man? Please help ease my mind.

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A female reader, rayvin400 United States +, writes (23 August 2017):

I don't know what the heck lies these people are feeding you but yes women can get bored too. We are just not as able as men are to go move on to other men. YET. With the rise of income amongst women, we are starting to feel as if we don't need the same man, or any man if we aren't happy.

Getting that out of the way, back to your question. Yes, women get bored. 14 years with the same man, you don't think she's even at least glanced at the 25-year-old guy with muscles at the beach and wondered what he would be like in bed. BS if you think she doesn't. Women have been proven to be just as visual as men, but men like to lie to themselves and think its ok if I'm fat and bald just as long as my wife doesn't get fat.

WRONG. Wonder why your wife isn't interested in you? You have a beer belly, no hair and you smell. Try that.

2ndly, the Coolidge effect now can also be applied to female species of hamsters, and I'm sure if men want to act like they can stray from their parters because of biology based on a Rooster, then women can also use this study in favor of their desire for new mates.

YES YES YES, we may love our husbands, but I'll be damned if that guy in the next cubicle over didn't smell like heaven and make me sweat a bit when he comes over to me.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2008):

i lived with my ex girl friend for 6 years and i love her alot but the first 5 year was good.

When you have a career change she get bored with you !

because you dont do thing at the weekend alote.

she will start looking else where for sex but not love.

if you take your self out off the relationship for 1 year and dont answer her calls.

women hate being IGNORE it the one thing dont like.!

She will want you back so bad in her life. .

She will relys for her self what she looking for in the end not sex but love..!

women will sleep with a man to find this out. .!

women are shallow AND cheap. . !

she still call me after 3 years tell me she still love me and she with new man now; what that about any one out there know. .?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2008):

Its not how long its how interested he is in you, variety is the sspice of life but it doesnt need to be elswhere think about it. What do you really want why are u thinking this is this your though about change or hers like the saying goes its what you do with it 1 a month is not enough i think good luck.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2008):

I can only answer for myself.Iv been with the same guy 7 years now.Iv been in other relationships but iv never felt this way about anyone else.Iv had good sex and bad sex and just ok sex and i can honestly say one of the biggest turn ons for me is the thought that im making love to the one person i adore most in the world.Dont get me wrong,sometimes it seems we get stuck in2 a routine but you try 2 make things different,ask her if shes any fantasys,read books and try new things,one of my fantasys{untried}is to dress up and arrange to meet somewhere.Pretend to have met for the 1st time and pick each other up.You might be worried for nothing,it might only be you thinking about it.I dont no if iv answered your question but i do hope iv helped some.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank all of you for taking time to write lately the sex has been awsome and got over if she thinks about being bored with me i guess i see so many women sleeping around and think she not satisfied with me because i was the only one.Its all good no worries loving life and sex hahahaa.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2008):

If this is something you haven't really talked out loud about, I have a suggestion... Assuming that you still flirt a little, maybe wink at her as you pass her in the hall.

Ok, leave her a little note, somewhere you know she'll get it. Tell her how you want to be with her, that you miss her. Then pose a question of HER wants. Tell her that you want to do what SHE wants... it needs to be something that you two have never done together.

This will allow her to think about it, it may take hours, possibly days for her to get up the courage to tell you. You may find a note back from her, or she may just say it out loud. Be patient... and after several days, and if you still haven't heard from her about your note, then bring it up.

Many times, even with all the years you two have together, it can be difficult to 'ask' for what she wants/needs if that isn't part of your normal sex life.

I hope this helps!

Good luck!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007):

I think you need to stop worrying about if she thinks about other men or not. Just because you are the only man she has slept with, there is nothing wrong with that. As a matter of fact, it is to be greatly commended. Women do not need to 'experiment' or 'sleep around'. Women need a caring man who takes care of her needs, and that does include sexuality.

If you're together so long, I take it you have a good marriage. Questions about your sex life. Is she satisfied? If you finish too quickly, or do it the same way everytime, there may be some boredom in her sex life. That doesn't mean she wants another man, but maybe you can ensure that she enjoys each and every sexual experience with you. 2nd, how come in your 30's you're only having sex once per month? I see that as a potential problem. I know you're not 20 anymore and don't need/want it multiple times per day, but it should still be at least once or twice per week, not once a month. Are there sexual issues in your marriage and that's why you are asking about if she would desire another guy? If you two love each other and please each other sexually, she will never want or even be curious about another man. Take a hard look at your sex life and frequency.

Write back with your answers or if you want more advice.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007):

Suppose I will have to give the mature answer here. She won't be having thoughts of having sex with other men. If you feel like she is...its probably because you feel you too have hit a rut..and believe you me its not because she's not having sex with other blokes. You just need to find new things to do, either as a couple or find a new hobby for yourself. Sex does not fulfill a woman.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

All the stuff you guys/girls have wrote ive done all them gifts tell her how im sooo lucky to have her show her in every way i mean i tell people shes my best friend and i tell her to honestly im a great man inside ouy no bragging all her friends hit on me all the time and she doesnt see what a great guy i am they do you name it ive done it i really think shes insecure of her weight i still love her the same if not more im just a sexual guy but also a loveable guy to her and some.i get bored of the same missionary position i want to smack it flip rub it down she makes it fissle i know i dont suck at sex belive me i dont i just dont get down to it i like to explore her whole body from head to toe and between. hahha

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2007):

she may need excitment in her sex life. change it up a bit and see how she likes it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007):

No not at all. Well I have never been in a relationship for as long as you but I am not promiscuous anyways. Like I can't have sex with random people. I find that gross. So it is so special to be with just one person that I love and trust. The only thing that I would be picky about is that he is good in bed. Mind you I am 28 and reaching my sexual peak so that stuff is important to me.

I guess it is possible that she may want to be with another guy just cause anything is possible. But people usually love there partners until or unless they feel like there is someone better out there. Just remember that sex and love are alot more connected than people give credit for. I mean keep the spark and connection alive sexually and emotionally.

Just go out and shower her with gifts your next paycheck. Make her feel like a queen. Just splurge. Buy her a diamond or something. Make her feel like you are the best guy out there. And try to be really good in bed. Really sexy. Take control. Next time you see her looking pretty just grab her and do your thing. Don't be gentle. Take her hand and put it on your penis and don't ask her, but TELL her to stroke it. Make sure your voice is deep and serious. And tell her how sexy she looks and don't say anything else.

And be sure to show her love too. Tell her how much you love her and you are so happy with her and she is so beautiful.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007):

Of course women get bored of having sex the same over and over again. Men get bored of having sex with just one woman, they need variety. Women need variety too! Maybe role play with her or try new things in bed to keep it all spicy. Surprise her with it or something. Also give her more sex, once a month isnt much!

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A male reader, Luvmawife United Kingdom +, writes (1 December 2007):

ask your wife the question your asking here....if she is there are plenty of ways of spicing up your sex life ...but first you need the right answers from your wife..maybe its just a period in her life that she cant actually be bothered with sex with anyone

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A female reader, bqagirl2692 United States +, writes (1 December 2007):

bqagirl2692 agony auntMaybe she is just use to the same routine. Try to spice things up a bit. Dont rush into the moment. Make her feel like it is her first time again. And i dont believe all women think the same because everyone is different and everyone has experienced a little more than others. Anyone can last with just one person. You just have to keep her excited and try not to do the same things all the time. There are a lot of info out there that you can get and a lot of things you can use to create your sex life with your wife a lot more intimate and exciting that the both of you can enjoy together. Make her feel young again.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007):

hi,

well for starters 14 years is a very long time but do you really want to sleep around with other men whilst in your marriage?

why not try and introduce sex toys? spice thigns up a little!

good luck with your decision

Jo x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2007):

hi,

well for starters 14 years is a very long time but do you really want to sleep around with other men whilst in your marriage?

why not try and introduce sex toys? spice thigns up a little!

good luck with your decision

Jo x

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