A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I'm still in love with my ex. We were only together for 10 months but i've never loved anyone as much as i love him. Everyone said how perfect we were together, we were so alike but at the same time we were so different. We lived 144 miles apart and we decided that it was best to end it because of how much it hurt us to be apart. Now 3 months on i still regret it. I told him that i missed him, after just a month and he said that we just needed time. But these feelings just won't go away. I have been out with a few other guys but its never gone past the first date...because they're not my ex. I don't know whether i need to move on, or to see if he still loves me.
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move on, my ex Reply to this Question |
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male
reader, Danielepew  + ♥, writes (11 October 2007):
 Dear, you need to move on. This is what seems best for you. When he said you just needed time, what he meant was that you'll eventually forget about him.
I suppose you two live in the United States. Maybe there was no way for you two to live in the same location, but I wonder if he thought about it. If he did, and concluded that it wouldn't be possible, then his wanting to stay away from you has good reason. If this supposition were true, then you and him can't be together, and it's best if you move on.
Be strong.
A
female
reader, brooke5426 +, writes (11 October 2007):
 I think if he is saying you need time, he means you both need time to move on. which tells me he doesnt want to get back together. you need to look at the reasons for the break up. it just wasnt working and the distance was too much and too painful.
dont put pressure on yourself to move on. its not something you can control or something you can do so dont get mad at yourself for not having done it yet. the moving on part happens all by itself, you dont have to do anything. you just have to take it one day at a time and know that one day this will all be over and you will be happy with someone else. but until then take some time out, hang out with friends, for the love of god keep busy! nothing depresses you quicker after a break up than moping around the house all day having nothing to think about other than him. have some "me time" and just be your own best friend and look after yourself.
take care
brooke
xx
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A
female
reader, baby duck  + ♥, writes (10 October 2007):
 It takes two. If he's saying you need time, he's not looking to get back together. Especially with the distance, you both have to want it.
I know it hurts. If you got over him in a few weeks, it would not have been love.
I don't think going out on dates when you're still pining for someone else is a good idea; for you or the poor guy that has no idea there's a third person on the date. When you want company, go out with a group or a girlfriend.
Get comfortable being alone. You are the only person that will always be there. If you know yourself well and enjoy yourself alone, then if you get back with that guy or meet another, you'll already be happy and he'll be the cherry on top!
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A
female
reader, bitterblue  + ♥, writes (10 October 2007):
 Many choose to break up because they can't handle the distance and all that it implies. Some manage for a period of time, others cheat because of their weakness. Reactions of all sorts. Yes, you have to move on. Even if the decision hadn't been taken now recently, it would have intervened in time with postponement for sure. It is not a good idea to let time [pass you by] like this. You've decided you can't tolerate this distance and it hindered your relation. Of course, a relation can hardly be entertained with phone calls from hundreds of miles away. Think that [should] you be together, it will happen, but don't sit in the middle of the road waiting for that day for it may never come dear. You have to be rational and accept the reality. Meanwhile think you are not replacing him and what he meant to you nobody can take away as it exists in your history but you have to continue with your life and learn to smile to the memories. Why not, you can continue as friends. I wish you peace...
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