A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have liked this girl for a long time. We're great friends and I would love to be with her. However, she has always had boyfriends, and when I did ask her out, she sent me a nice email saying that we would never be more than friends (that was about 4 yrs ago).However, when I asked her and her bf over for a meal, she said 'ok, that be cool'. Then I learn from her, they keep on arguing and rowing and she wants to come out of it. Do I make a move yet, or just wait and invite her over as a friend? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): She has been clear with you. Nothing has changed. She likes you as a friend, which is great. So you really have to stop hoping and just enjoy her friendship. She likes to confide in you, as friends do. So please don't torture yourself any more - she is a friend and not a potential girlfriend.
A
female
reader, MsSadie  +, writes (12 March 2012):
 It doesn't sound like she's interested. Save yourself from distress by leaving her be. Besides, if you continue to "make a move" despite her disinterest, you will not only not have her as a girlfriend but also lose her as a friend.
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A
male
reader, Tom Obler +, writes (12 March 2012):
 Hello,
I will be honest here. You have NO chance.
This is not a good thing to keep hoping for something with her. You are wasting time here and 4 years have passed already. You may hope that her present troubles will lead her into your arms but I doubt they will.
However, If you wish to satisfy yourself once and for all, then you could make a deal with yourself. Give yourself a few more months, say 2 more months where you will try again. If your answer is friends and no, then you must then accept you will move on from anymore hope. Please satisfy this as soon as possible because you really will waste a long time waiting and hoping. Please send an update. Best wishes and good luck.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 March 2012):
 I agree 100% with Blonde68
you don't make a move and you don't wait...
you've liked her a long time and she's made it clear to you that she's not interested in anything other than friend zone with you.... you have to respect that.
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A
female
reader, Blonde68 +, writes (12 March 2012):
I really don't know how to put this to you, other than being completely straight!
This girl isn't interested in you other than just purely as a friend who she can talk to - besides she has already made it clear to you that you will always be nothing but friends irrespective of how long ago it was. You say she has had lots of boyfriends - So don't you ever ask yourself why you have never been one of them?
I am sorry, but you need to stop hoping that one day you will be her boyfriend and find a girl that IS interested in you as boyfriend material.
My advice is, don't make a move on her. If you really have a burning desire to see her then just invite her over as a friend - who knows, you may prove me wrong and she decides she would like to try a relationship, however, I sense that she has had lots of opportunities over the last 4 years and it hasn't happened.
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