A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My Gf and I had been going out for over two years and everything was great, we did everything together. Shortly before our second anniversary her friends all went single all at the same time and it began to put a lot of stress on our relationship because they people who didnt bother with her when they had boyfriends had all this time on there hands and began to call and ask to do stuff everyday thusly effecting our time together.I tried to make things work and adjust but we began to fight and fight more and more. I told her not to forget her past and where all these people were when she needed them. We tried and tried to make it work and i love this girl to bits, we didnt spend New Years together and that because she made plans with her friends instead of me which i was invited but me being stuborn declined and live with the regret of that.It began to be more imporant for her to be with her friends then myself, i was unable to make plans with her on the weekend until she had alrady made plans with her friends which i personally think is not right. What has happened is that she is a totally changed girl, she is not the girl i even knew in 2008 and now it has turned into clubs every weekend party here party there when this girl never use to drink at all, it wasnt her thing as she had said. So her and the girls all went out one evening and semi made a pact, that it was going to be girls first and all this and as i told her talk is cheap and very easy to say when you are not in a relationship with someone but to no avail could i get this message through and she thinks its going to be her and her girls for the rest of there days.So we talked and she doesnt want to be in a relationship anymore but she wants to remain friends and i find it very difficult because whenever i even see her name my heart skips a beat let alone all the songs and such on the radio that we use to like. I know deep down that its not really her i am talking to, is ms popularity, the girl i knew showed emotions and cared the one i talk to now is just cold hearted and doesnt care about anything, showed no emotion unlike myself when we were having this conversation. i believe that hurts the most because this girl was so in love with me and now she someone i and herself dont know. She has lost herself, as i have seen and self admitted and doesnt know who she is and what she wants, but is willing to follow her friends because she is popular then.She has a lot of stress and was trying to please to many people and in the end i lost out, when i wanted nothing more then to try and give her all the happiness in the world. So now i have a broken heart and i still want to be with her, We have only been broken up about a month. I would do anything because i was so in love with her and she means the world to me, Do i let someone that i care for so much make a mistake that i believe they will end up regretting for a long time and myself move on or hold out hoping that we can get back together and make it work. If it is I and her alone anywhere we dont fights its all this 3rd party bs. So, how do i move on and get over a broken heart, or stay and hope that the girl i knew comes back?Thanks in advanceBroken Hearted
View related questions:
anniversary, cheap, get back together, her past, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Luaris  +, writes (20 March 2009):
 Its totally understandable to be offended that her loyalty shifted from you to her on again off again friends. My guess is she probably went out one night and while thinking "Girls first!" cheated on you. Thats why she wants to break up because she feels bad and doesnt want to tell you, but she still has feelings for you so she wants to be friends. Judging by how clearly shes been acting uncaring toward you shes probably lying to you. I would let her go and think about how stupid she was cheapening herself and hope she enjoys being a shallow party girl and start over. Thats just how I see it.
A
male
reader, Johnnyboy03 +, writes (20 March 2009):
 To be honest, it sounds like you were being a bit too jealous of her spending time with her friends. If you wanted to give her all the happiness in the world you should have encouraged her to hang out with her friends, and also went with her. Like you said, you were usually invited but you were being selfish because you wanted her to just focus on you.
If you want to be with her then you need to change YOUR attitude. Not wait for her because you think she is making a mistake hanging out with her friends. If you get a second chance with her. (which is what it would be, your second chance.) Try to be a little less possessive of her time, and instead share the friends with her.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2009): What you have to ask yourself is what will happen when her mates find boyfriends again? My guess is that she will come crawling back. It depends weather your prepared to wait for this to happen. Sooner or later her friends will find boyfriends again. Tho maybe a bit of playing the field in between might make you feel better, and also make her realise what shes missing
Good Luck
...............................
|
