A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have been married for several years and my relationship with my husband has become like a boarder/room mate kind. We used to be so close and go to church together but now, I, like him have back slided and don't attend church. I try to pass the time by finding people to chat with and I met this guy on the net who became close to me. And because of his sweetness and care I fell in love with him. I honestly believe that I felt love, it felt vibrant to be alive. Our relationship (both physical and emotional) lasted for about 3 months then suddenly I had this realization that I wasn't pleasing God with what I was doing. For me this is the tool God used to make me go back to Him as my life now is being run by this man. He won't accept this reason and he is warning me that he will expose our relationship with everyone I know by exposing our chats etc. in this forum that I frequent. He says he is doing this because I deceived him and he wants to destroy me and there is no stopping him once he proves that he is right. Every time he tells me this I pray harder. Do you think I deceived him? He wants to know what others think. He says I am wrong but its honestly because I want to live a good life now. Please help me.
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female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (8 December 2007):
 You did not deceive him. He knew you were married.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question"He" is my ex-lover. He has asked me to post what happened to us so that people can judge me if I have deceived him.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (7 December 2007):
Hi Dear Poster,
I'm not quite sure that I understand which "He". Are you talking about your ex-lover or your husband?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe has read this post and says that I have lied a lot in this post. He says that I try to act so innocent and always use God as my excuse. I apologize to him because he says I have tricked him. I am truly sorry for hurting him.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (1 December 2007):
The only way that you can stop him from exposing you is to beat him to the punch. Tell your husband and beg his forgiveness. If your husband truly loves you he will find a way to forgive you. This cowardly man that you were involved with has his own agenda and is not concerned about your feelings at all. What kind of love did this man have for you if he wants to destroy you now? The only person who was deceived here was your husband as the innocent party. The other man knew that you were married and has no right to complain now that you have come to your senses. He really is very selfish and his plan to expose you is cruel. I'm afraid he is really forcing your hand in this matter and quite possibly will make good on his threat. The only way to unarm him is to take a chance and tell the truth. Best of luck and I hope that things work out for you, Dear.
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A
male
reader, auvi  +, writes (1 December 2007):
first of all, any man who tries to do such thing is an evil man termed by any religion. what he is trying to do to you is a sin and you are doing the right think by trying to stay away from him.
for your husband, yes long married life can always erode the past charm, but it doesnt mean that they cant be brought back. try out something new together, that can be a new dish, or a vacation together or something new in bed. surprise him and act like a lover. then u can also expect something back in return.
and for handling that man , it is a messy job to keep such threats in private. u may call a private detective
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