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Dating only 5 months and already he's making excuses to not cuddle/have sex?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 January 2012) 2 Answers - (Newest, 27 January 2012)
A age 30-35, * writes:

I have been with my boyfriend for a few months and he is as sweet as hell! helped me move into my flat, would do anything for me, but the last couple of days I have been feeling really annoyed with him but i dont know why~! actually i do know why!

we were in bed the night i moved into my flat and he was only staying over a couple of nights, me I like to make the most of eachother when hes here, soo when we didnt cuddle or anything I became quite upset, I know its probably an over reaction and I didnt say anything to him just had a couple of tears and fell asleep

I was talking to him on facebook last night and I made a joke about it by saying ohh ud rather cuddle ur pillow than me (ever since ive had a double bed he does this) and he said sorry he was tired and the bed wasnt comfy (I was waiting for my new bed to come) I know he was probably tired but come on hes 20 for god sake! we have been together what 5 months and already hes saying hes tired lol im worried!!!!!!!! another excuse is ohhh we have uni and work in the morning, I didnt even want sex just a bloody cwtch is tht too much to ask for! not all night just for a few minutes before sleeping lol Please people tell me if im over reacting? my friends think im mean lol i prbz am

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A female reader, eri_sunshine Canada +, writes (27 January 2012):

You know, he probably was very tired and uncomfortable. And why didn't you make a move? Maybe he was waiting for you to cuddle with him! Don't always leave it up to the men out there- take initiative. He's your boyfriend and if you want to cuddle in bed, then grab him and pull him close! It doesn't sound like as much of an excuse to me more than it sounds like a legitimate reason. Don't worry.

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A female reader, Probablylucy United Kingdom +, writes (27 January 2012):

Probablylucy agony auntMany women (sorry if this is a sexist assumption...) have the opposite problem! Perhaps there is some underlying issue he doesn't want to talk about, you never know, he might be having some other problem that is preventing him from being intimate. However, it could be that perhaps you are 'over-thinking' the situation, count your blessings: You have a wonderful, sweet, caring boyfriend, pestering him for physical intimacy might push him away! For this problem there is only one remedy, and that's time. Instead of nagging for sex/ cuddles, why don't you simply get into bed naked/ in a sexy night dress? you never know, subtle sexy little details might just drive him crazy for you! but the important thing is just don't push him too much, let him come to you!

I hope this helps :)

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