A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm hoping someone can help me out here. I'm in a pretty desperate situation at the moment. You see, I've been dating three women simultaneously for the past 3 years and now I want to cut that number down to to one.The first girl I'm with, Clara, I got with shortly after my 19th birthday. Although we have our differences, we have shared a lot of good times together and I am truly head over heels in love with this woman. Unfortunately, she's quite ugly and making love to her is about as pleasant for me as making love to an overfed pig would be. This is what led to me begin seeing Girl No.2 - who is gorgeous, sexually adventurous and - best of all - easy. We have been gf and bf for almost 2 and a half yrs, but I'm only with her because she is hot. The third girl, Chris, I met in a bookstore and we have tons in common. We've been dating for about 2 years now and enjoy each other's company, but have only slept together six times. I want to break it off with Jane (Girl 2) and Chris, but here's my dilemma:1. Even though I only really 'love' Clara, I'm not in the least bit attracted to her and have to imagine other women when we have sex. This is a problem.2. The sexually voracious Jane loaned my almost 30 grand to cover my college expenses. I want to repay the money before breaking it off with her, but how? I don't have a job and little money.3. Chris and I have become friends as well as lovers. How can I make sure breaking-up with her won't ruin our friendship.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2009): 1st, its time to grow up a little bit.
Don't stay with anyone because of money they loaned you, sex or looks alone.
Looks fade, yours will too and one day you may find yourself with a woman saying you look like a pig. This girl deserves someone better than you. If you say you are head over heals in love with her, you don't know what love really is. Break it off with her before you hurt her any more.
Girl number two is a sex toy, get a movie and some lube and allow her to find someone who will appreciate her for more than just sex.
Girl number three, again let her go as well and quit playing her.
The one who loaned you money is a fool if she didn't get a contract. Pay her off over time and own up to your obligations.
The bottom line is you need to find someone that gives you everything you need. It is boys like you that give decent men a bad reputation.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (3 April 2009):
 1. How can you say you love Clara but at the same time find her repulsive? I don't get it.
2. How can you repay Jane if you don't have any income? Maybe she'd be willing to wait for it if she gets an IOU in writing. Then when you do get employed a portion or your paycheck goes to her until it's paid off.
3. You most likely will lose this friendship with Chris. The lovers part most likely will over-shadow the friendship part.
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