A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:okay here one i think everyone has heard, but I think phycological i need to hear the answer.My boyfriend of two years is distant. he says it is cause of my nagging him to make plans or for us to work together on this relationship. Well he no longer date me, takes for granted, accuses me of havin another when i am out, but no I enjoy outdoors alone, doesnt touch me, making love to him feels like just for him, doesnt please me, and when his kids are around I am just a fly on the wall.? Does he not love me any more, does he really think that my nagging bothers him, does he not want to be with me but waiting for golden oppurtunity? Could it be he has forgotten why we are together in the first place and only needs me when convient to him. I have been taking the advice here, I know I should leave him to be his selfish self, he has not always been this way, my problem, I believe in the goodness in his soul and think if I do odd things he will realize this and be the real man he was. What do you think? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (21 April 2012):
 From the sounds of it, your boyfriend isn't making you a priority in his life.
It would appear that you have addressed your concerns with him and his response is that he is tired of talking about the state of your relationship. He seems to have accepted it for the way that it is.
Is your constant checking on the status of your relationship akin to picking at a healing scab? I suspect he may be feeling a little overwhelmed by your neediness or quite simply he has fallen out of love with you and is just hanging on because your time together. The more you talk about the state of your relationship the further he withdrawals.
Could he return back to the loving man that he once was? Perhaps. No one can really determine that with any certainty. If we knew more about what was really troubling him (or even if he posted here his feelings / thoughts) there may be some hope.
I think you need to take a step back and ask yourself if this is the man you truly want to invest more time in or has this relationship truly run its course. I certainly don't have the answer given the limited details and your history. If he is not putting in the same amount of energy, time and love into the relationship that you want and deserve, I think the answer is pretty simple.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 April 2012):
 Honestly, I think the relationship has run its course. Perhaps try having one last talk with him, ask him if he wants to be in a relationship with you, ask him why he thinks you are together, tell him you feel untouched and unloved. If he isnt willing to even acknowledge or discuss your concerns you know what you need to do.
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