A
male
age
41-50,
*dmaddox11
writes:I need some advice. I have have this coworker that has been flirting for some time with me. He always winks and sometimes make sexual comments - not too strong.He had a girlfriend and he made it aware to me that they were broken up, stating that he was kind of treated bad. After that, He invited me to his home to hang out but the plans had to change due to working schedule. I have given him my number but he hasnt used it. However, If i miss a day of work he is always asking where I have been.Ok - I said to myself that I would give him a chance and arrange a trip to hang out. So, a few coworkers (singles) are getting together for a trip two hours away so I made the reservations for us to share a suite and I asked him about it and he was ok..... Then he told me that he may invite a buddy of his. I am usually a good judge of character... however, I have been wrong before. I am not sure as what to make of this situation.I need to know how to handle this subjectively before I invest too much time... Please advise...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (26 October 2012):
 I want you to focus on the big picture, not the small details of flirting. Just take a look at the big picture.1. "I have given him my number but he hasnt used it."Since he is not a shy person and flirts with you, why do you think he has not called you? You GAVE him your number. You put yourself out there in more than just flirting. The ball is in his court, but he is not picking it up.And most importantly, we can move to #2" I made the reservations for us to share a suite and I asked him about it and he was ok..... Then he told me that he may invite a buddy of his."Again, once again, you're the one chasing him. You're doing all the action. You invited him to share a suite. That's like waving a green light for sex or any type of intimacy. And what does he do? He wants to invite his buddy? I think it's pretty clear he is just not that interested. If he were, he would be calling you, taking you out on dates, or going along with your plans. He is not doing anything more than flirting. That just means he is just not that into you. Men rarely like to be chased unless they're looking for a piece of ^^s on the side and he clearly isn't. Not yet anyway.
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