A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and i been togehter for about a year and a half and last week on tuesday he broke up with me. While i was at work he packed all his things and left the apartment we were both renting. He called me every night for that week and everytime i call him he doesnt pick up. Everytime we talked he always has something different to say. He says he wants to be with me but he dont, then he says that there is hope for us getting back together, and then he says that he doesnt want to rush into anything. and that if he sees changes in me after a month or two we'll get back together.He told me i needed to make a few changes about myself and i have. I've learned to accept his son, apologized to his family and friends, and even accepted god into my life to keep me on the right path.People say to tell him that it takes two to make a relationship work not one as it does to make one fail, and that i've already thrown everything im willing to do on the table to work everything out with him. He even asked for my dads permission to marry me.I just dont know what he wants.I havent called him only for about the rent and lease for the apartment, and i need some help and answers.I mean im his first real love.Will we ever get back together if i just let him do all the calling and chasing?Was it because we moved to fast?What else can i do to show him i really do want to be with him and work things out other than wait?
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female
reader, rockelle +, writes (24 January 2008):
 It sounds to me like you are making all the compromises in this relationship. That doesn't sound fair. It seems like you have taken responsibility for everything that went wrong in the relationship. To be honest, if he really wanted to make this relationship work he should have came to you BEFORE he decided to leave, then you could have worked things out. I could be wrong but it sounds like this guy already has his mind made up, and now it is time for you to accept that it is over and move on. If you need help with the rent maybe you should get a roommate??? He ran out on you and if I were you I would be upset and worried that if I take him back he would do it again. I am glad to hear that you accepted God into your life, I hope that you did that for the right reasons. Remember it takes two people to make a relationship work.
A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse  +, writes (24 January 2008):
 It does take two to make things work. At the moment it sounds like you're doing all the work and perhaps compromising too much? What is he actually doing?
I ended my last relationship since I seemed to put in the effort and got nothing much in return except more demands. Take, take, take. In the end I left. Perhaps, in my case, she had become bored with the relationship and wanted to get out of it. Perhaps not. Whatever the case I don't regret leaving at all now (although to be fair it has taken a couple of months to get it all out of my system and get over it).
IT TAKES 2 TO TANGO.
Concentrate on yourself; pamper and treat yourself and get in touch with your friends and get out there. When you're ready, you'll meet other guys, take things slow, and you never know where you will find that special someone.
I'm sure one day he'll realise what he's done and he'll regret letting you go. His loss.
Best of luck :)
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (24 January 2008):
 You have done all you can unconditionally.You are bending backwards till you are going to break and he still imposed new conditions.
The best thing for you is to walk away from him and make him realized that he is the one that needs you more than you need him.
The best strategy is to give him up and he will come back to you once he realized that he cannot control you anymore.
Since you have acceded to his every request and nothing works.
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