A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I met a man on my holiday and we said we would stay friends. At first5 he ansawered my e mails but now he isnt so I can take it as a brush off. However If I sent e mails and they werent getting to him would it come back as undeliverable or not neccesarily can they just get lsot in the system. Also I have sent an electronic card and it says he has viewed it so does this mean he has definitely opend it and it hasnt gone in the trash can?? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Uncle Sneaker +, writes (8 July 2008):
 Mails can get "lost in the system".
If he, or his Internet Service Provider, or his company techies if it's a business mail address/mail server, have an over-enthusiastic anti-spam filter, which is quite common these days with the amount of spam mail around, it may well be that your e-mails are either sitting in a "spam folder" or have been deleted without allowing a "deleted without being read receipt" to be sent back.
Hotmail's anti-spam filter is similar. Until recently when Microsoft "tweaked" the settings a bit, any mail I sent to any Hotmail address from my personal mail just disappeared - it didn't even end up in the recipient's spam folder, and it didn't bounce back.
Of course this doesn't mean that he's not just deleting your mails. If your mail has the option, turn on the "request a read receipt". In Outlook Express it's Tools, Options, Receipts and then tick "Request a read receipt for all sent messages" - other mail clients and mail systems vary, but most of them have that option somewhere. It's still not conclusive, because his end may deliberately deny sending receipts, but at least if you get a "your mail was deleted without being read" receipt on each one, then you know where you are.
The e-card receipt really depends on which of the e-card providers you sent it from. Some will produce a receipt that it's been read when it's simply been delivered to the right mail server.
A
female
reader, x Nic x +, writes (8 July 2008):
 The emails would come back as undeliverable if there was a problem with his email address but as you have not had this notification and he has opened the ECard you sent, I am guessing his email is working just fine.
When was the last time he replied to one of your emails? You could send him another email asking if he is receiving your emails, give him time and if he does not reply then is he worth the hassle?
Good Luck
x x x
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A
female
reader, Bobbyjo +, writes (8 July 2008):
 im not sure, but with my hotmail account I know that if something doesnt get received on the other side I will receive notification to inform me that it was undeliverable. I dont know what email you have so not sure if this is the same for you.
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