A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Completely move on or just do my own thing and wait?I'm in love with a girl (she currently has a bf) and she knows it. She'd do things like let me hold her, sleep next to her (never spoon or ne thing like that), and slow dance with me, while telling me that it was cause she wanted to let me know we were still friends... what kind of friends do those things? Especially when that kind of intense feelings are involved? Since we were best friends she'd tell me things like how she liked to test people. Once a guy had feelings for her but never told her until he started dating another girl. Why he waited is beyond me, but she said not to break up with the girl he was seeing. Then told me that if the guy really liked her as much as he said, he'd break up with the gf and persue her instead. That didn't happen, he listend to what the girl told him and stayed with his gf.Friends tell me to move on but I don't want to. She is worth it the possibility of me being single for the rest of my life waiting for her. I just want to know if I should let her come to me? Or do I keep persuing her? I'm very afraid that if I stop calling and what not, she'll forget about me and we'll never get together.If you're going to tell me to let her go completely or wait for her to come to me, PLEASE be as blunt as hell! Hopefully it will get through my head.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2007): Ok here a blunt answer: What the hell is wrong with you? She is in a relationship with someone. the two of them are probably in love with one another and you want to ruin that. For what? So that you can be happy even if a loving couple is torn apart because of it? She obviously does not see you as a sexual partner, I doubt she even thinks you're pursuing her. More likely she sees you as a friend nothing more. At this rate you'll end up old and alone pining for what never was. Just move on. Hopefully that was blunt enough.
A
female
reader, flower girl  +, writes (8 July 2007):
 She is so not worth putting your life on hold for, sorry to say that but you said be blunt.
If she really cared for you she would be with you, rather than playing with your emotions the way that she is.
Babe you are young and i know you love her but she is with someone else and until the time comes when she is not then you should really get out there and enjoy yourself and meet other people.
Sometimes this sort of thing works well to get the person you really like as well, at the moment she knows how you feel about her even if you have not told her and she is keeping you dangling with her mind games, so she has the best of both worlds.
Take that away from her and she might realise she actually wants you, if not then it's her loss.
Take care.xx.
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A
male
reader, Say It Straight +, writes (8 July 2007):
Is she gay? you say she has a boyfriend so she could be bi,or maybe shes straight and doesnt know how to behave around you after you confessed your love for her.think about it when you two were just best mates nothing could have a double meaning, she could dance with you, hug you and crash in the same bed as just friends,like all girls do. Now she isnt sure how to act round you without leading you on, she's still been affectionate because your friends and not because she's going to start dating you.The intense feelings are on your side they are not mutual.Are you seriously going to put your life on hold for a straight girl who has a boyfriend? get real,get over it and get out into the big wide world before you loose out on life and your friend as well.
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