A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Can a man be in love with his mistress and his wife at the same time? But is torn between the two.
View related questions:
mistress Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): yes if he's allowed to. but would he be able to reciprocate, probably not.
A
female
reader, sadmistress  +, writes (25 October 2007):
love is infinite.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): Ah I see now where you thought I said "equally". The question was "Can a man be in love with his mistress and wife at the same time?" and I said yes, but I didn't take into consideration if it meant "Can a man be in love with his mistress and wife at equally?" Then no, most likely not.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): Well I didn't say 'equally'. Just like my love for my friends - how can I distinguish my brotherly love for friend A and friend B? Do I love them the same way - look up and idolize them the same way? No. They both have different traits that I admire and connect with.
One thing I've learned over the years, is that people who's lives/thoughts are simpler, have a simpler and more absolute definition of what love is to them. Those who's thoughts are more 'complex', have less absolute definitions of what love and anything in the world for that matter may be.
If you add 'milestones' to ppl's connections with other ppl, you can say that it goes from: 1) interest/attraction, 2) liking, *3) strong desire/lust, 4) falling in love, 5) in love, and 6) unity.
*Mind u, a lot of ppl just go from liking someone, date for awhile and start loving that person - however that works.
...............................
A
male
reader, Lostandalone  +, writes (12 September 2006):
 Martini. You went to the bottom of the ocean on that!!! You have to also understand that yes there are variables that determine stances on your theory. Yes, lust and love have something in common. You can have either without the other. Now to say you can feel these things equally for two different people is far fetched or unreasonable at best. This subject of the heart leaves room for unparalelled debate. The thing is to distinguish which is more powerful that lust or that love and which one drives that inner being in all or most and that defines the extent of either.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): I would think it's possible, but the elements that make up love for the different individuals may be different. It's nice to think of an existing absolute love, but if you look at a spectrum of colours, there isn't such thing as an absolute red, or an absolute green, or yellow, or blue... Now is there? People can generally assign that Pantone 151 C as the absolute orange, but others may challenge that assignment and say Pantone 1505 C is the absolute orange and so on and so forth.
Let's put it into perspective, there will always be a set of ideals and preferences you lust and desire. Lust would be the prerequisite of love wouldn't u think so? If u didn't lust (and all the shades of lust, liking, wanting, needing) for someone you love now, you wouldn't have liked her in the first place.
I couldn't say there is a fine line between absolute lust and absolute love, but I can tell u that there is a gradual spectrum between lust and love. Where does the mistress stand and where does the wife stand?
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (12 September 2006):
 I agree with Lostandalone, lust and love are being confused. Love involves respect, this guy apparently doesn't respect either woman. So no matter which one you are, you deserve so much better.
...............................
A
male
reader, Lostandalone +, writes (12 September 2006):
I don't think so. I feel like a man who has love for his wife wouldn't have a mistress. Have an affair and still love I can see because there could be something missing at home at some point. That doesn't mean he doesn't love his wife. I think that this type of man is confusing lust for love. Having a full fledged relationship outside of the one at home is lack of respect and you can't love someone you don't respect. So my answer is no, at least not from where I am sitting.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): Yes, I agree to!
...............................
A
male
reader, CRS698 +, writes (12 September 2006):
 Yes it is possible. But its absolutely impossible to make it work without at least 1 person being hurt terribly.
And hopefully in the end it would be the man who gets hurt and ends up with no cake at all after trying to eat more than he deserves or needs.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2006): Put simply, yes.
...............................
|
