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Boyfriend is mad that I lost something special he gave me. Help!

Tagged as: Dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 March 2014) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 March 2014)
A female Australia age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hey everyone,

When my boyfriend and I initially started dating like a month into the relationship he gave me something which he thought brought luck to him, we have been together for a year now..

It was something he valued and he gave it to me and I lost it, it was lighter I don't know why that meant so much to him.. I should have been careful but I didn't and I couldn't ask people to help me look for it cuz its a lighter and my family would freak if they knew I was smoking!

What do I do? I confessed that I lost it and he's really mad.. No apology seems to be working!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2014):

I used to get mad when my wife would lose things of mine and throw them out at times. Do you want to know the real trick to stopping his wallowing over this one lost momento? Honestly, keep moving things around and throw the odd thing out, be it a monthly bill to pay, or any of his clothes with the slightest wear to them..small hole in them.. It may sound absurd, but take it from me, he'll eventually tell himself he just can't keep on it, no matter how organized he tries to be. My wife obsessively organizes things "her way", and this really works, because if I eventually gave up and stopped complaining and blaming her for each lost item, not matter how precious the value or meaning, so will he.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2014):

I like the first suggestion. Keep looking for it, but if you can't find it, as a sort of final apology try gifting him a really special lighter.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2014):

Just ask your family if they found 'his' lighter. Say he left it there somewhere or something. OP surely you know why a person giving you their "lucky" object is special, the only problem is he gave you the most easily lost item that has ever existed.

Just tell him you're still looking for it and do ask your family, they may have found it but haven't told you because they probably think you have nothing to do with it.

Just say he thinks he or another friend may have lost it there.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (12 March 2014):

Honeypie agony auntReplace it?

Find a nice zippo and have it engraved or something. And keep looking.

You can ONLY apologize so much.

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