A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 20 years old and been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years. She moved in my place in october when our daughter was born which she is 8 months old now. I'm so bored with the relationship, the sex ect. I acually fantasize about the last girl i've hooked up with it's that bad. I have so many urges to start talking to another girl but I don't because I know she will find out because shes the type of girl that goes through your phone when you leave the room. Sometimes I think if we never had the baby we wouldnt be together. lately we just dont really get along but I just don't have it in me to break up with her because I don't if i'm in love with her or just love her because i'm use to her and I don't want to make the wrong decision. I'm also worried that if we split its going to make things complicated with the baby. I really don't know what to do.
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female
reader, a_maldita  +, writes (26 June 2011):
 To rescuer I think this is the line anonymous is refering about "Sometimes I think if we never had the baby we wouldnt be together."
A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (26 June 2011):
it sounds to me that you only love her as you said cos you are used to her just explain to her that you will always be there for her and the baby if they need you and also that you want regular contact with the baby it sounds like you already know what you want to do
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2011): lots of people will try to talk you into rekindling your relationship. but to me it sounds like you know you don't want to be with her. If you feel that if it weren't for the baby you wouldn't be together, that's very telling. that means you probably shouldn't be together. the only reason you're with her is out of guilt, basically. this is a very bad relationship, that's why you don't want it and you find yourself thinking about other girls. you should break up with her. don't stay in a relationship out of fear of making a mistake, that's a surefire way to waste your life. it's not a mistake to break up with someone even though you have kids with them. having kids shoulnd't trap people together who don't want to be together otherwise you may eventually come to resent your own kid a few years down the road and they will grow up with issues.
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A
female
reader, a_maldita +, writes (26 June 2011):
Breaking up is not a solution not until you sort things out.. You are bored??? It's only been like 2 yrs since you've been together. If you really don't care and love her anymore you have to tell her either ways it's gonna hurt her badly but be honest. Cheating with another girl will only make things worst and complicated as it is now... Think of your baby first and not of yourself Good luck!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2011): your biggest responsibility in life right now is to support that child. you need to feed it, cloth it, put a roof over its head, and yes love it. loving your girlfriend is also caring for the baby, if your girlfriend doesnt feel loved, it's more difficult taking care of a child.you had a child, you must now care for it in every possible way.you are now on a steep learning curve. your sexual urges do not matter, they must be pushed aside.if they cannot be pushed aside, you can still at least be noble enough to continue to care for the child in any way you can.DO NOT cheat on your girlfriend. Try to love your girlfriend. At a young age, and seeing as you already have a child, and you're tempted to cheat, sex is on your mind a lot. You should do your best to love your girlfriend, and if sex matters a lot to you. you should tell her that you'd like it if she got more creative in bed.if you CANNOT stay faithful, then break up with her, but CONTINUE to care for the child as much as you humanly can.you are now responsible for a life. imagine that you were your own child, you would want your father to care for you, and for your mother.put yourself in the perspective of your child, what would she think of your actions when she got older?Good luck with everything.Try to love with your heart and not with your penis.And think from the perspective of your child, and your partner.-Andrew
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