A
female
age
30-35,
*arly_hen
writes:Ok, so to make the story short I am a 24 year old college graduate with a good job, raised as a roman catholic, believe in God. My guy friend who is 25 years old college graduate and no job when out for a couple of months during high school (it was all innocent, he never made a move, extremely shy). About a year an half ago we reconnected and we started hanging out, going to movies, dinner, coffee, museums, beach, roller blading etc...He's is a NICE/SHY respectful (Christian) doesn’t attend mass every single time but does believe in God, family orientate, sweet, calm, doesnt drink, a gentlemen, treats me well always goes out of his way. I have developed feelings for him and I told him how i felt, about 11 months ago, and he said he wanted to be financially stable, and that and the future we can have something. I know I can see my self with him and i have deeper feelings for him, but don’t want to force anything, the only physical contact we have had is hugs, kisses on the cheek, mutual massages, nibbling/biting slightly on each others ear, i intertwine my arm on his arm (and he doesn't pull back) he offers his jacket when am cold, we cuddle. Although, i always have to be the one saying "oh we should go out to etc...", he has done a couple of times. We talk about marriage and kids etc... every time i go out he tells me to "Be good and behave" I feel that I should bring up that i have feelings for him and or kiss him, but what we have its so nice, we text 24/7. I wake up to good morning text if he falls asleep first, we text all day everyday. We have pet names for each other and he tells me that he is shy but not with me, that he can text me all day and night. When we go out he tends to pay or i pay or we split, but, he doesn't like me paying, he told me that he doesn't want me to think that he's "taking advantage". I told him not to hurt me, and he responded by telling me that he wont hurt me. I have asked him, if me texting him bothers him and he has said no; not at all, he can text with me all day everyday. I just think i have fallen for him and well get my heart broken. Please help.
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male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (22 December 2011):
Well, it sounds like he's just an extremely shy person (but a good guy) that just can't bring himself to take things further. At this point I say, if he's handed the reigns to you, take them!From what I've read, it sounds like you both really like each other. In fact, it sounds like you're basically dating already: snuggling, playing (ear biting), going on dates, him feeling a need to pay, texting all day/night... the list goes on. You both just haven't had the courage to make it official.I say do it. Take the dive. You can be the one to take things further; there is no real that the man needs to do it. If you don't want to be that forward, you should at least plan on having a serious talk with him about both of your feelings. Find out exactly what he thinks of your current very close friendship. Get into his head and ask him to tell you what he thinks of you. Its obvious he likes being around you and enjoys the time he spends with you. But something is keeping him from wanting a relationship. Maybe its scary and he's worried of making himself vulnerable. There are plenty of reasons a guy could be unsure about entering a relationship, while still fully liking/caring for/wanting the girl. Find out what his reasons are.Good luck on everything.
A
male
reader, Ldu  +, writes (22 December 2011):
sounds like a genuine person and so do you. Sometimes the woman has to make the first move. It cant hurt to kiss him . So i suggest you make it romantic , while your cuddling or something sweet .
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