A
female
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anonymous
writes:Hey I've been having this problem for quite some time now.I know that I don't fancy girls, I fancy boys, but despite that I don't get 'turned on' when heavy petting with a guy. I have tried to have sex on several occasions with my ex who was also a virgin, and my current bf who is not...every time they seemed to not be able to enter me. Sometimes I think I'm not normal, as the tiniest litle bit of contact with my vagina is enough to make me squirm with pain, I cannot even use tampons. Is something wrong with me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2007): I'm not sure whether you've heard about this, or if anyone's mentioned it, but maybe you have vaginismus.Google it, there's lots of websites.Basically it's a tightening of the muscles inside your vagina.The face you've said you're unnable to use tampons made me think of it. You generally need to see a professional for an assessment.If you're under-age then that would cause a problem and you'd have to wait. Hope that helps?Xx
A
male
reader, Buty +, writes (11 August 2005):
Hi, I don't really wana rush into conclusions about your situation, but If this problem persist then I would advice you to read the book "Just for women" I have forgotten the author but will come back to you and let you know.
As for now I,m gona respond to your question from the perspective of a normal girl.
Bbay I think you are normal and most men would desire to have you. I must agree with one reader who said that probably you are not yet ready coz you did not tell us how old you are. First, I must bring to your realisation that a successful sex must be psycologically co-ordinated. Relax before attempting to have sex and just forget this thing that your are too tight for penetration. Get ready and discuss everything with your guy. He will help you to achieve your dreams and both of you will never separate after such a wonderful experience. May the Lord God help you overcome this. Thanks and Bye
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A
female
reader, carli +, writes (10 August 2005):
i was very similar to you not even a tampon was going anywhere near me my legs would completly tighten up and nothing would prize them apart, my mum would say you never gonna have sex if you can only open your legs that wide! its a matter of relaxing and it being the right time with you. i've never played with myself people used to say to me do this and you will soon relaxed i never could. at 18 only having kissed guys i met my now ex boyfriend and i fancied him so much it took 4 months for me to relax and he was older and worked really hard at keeping me still to enter. just keep trying remember you are normal thats important find someone you care about and no offensive to virgins but you need to be with someone who knows what there doing that way they can lead you and get you into your most comfortable position and have a laugh and giggle about it but make sure they care about you make a guy wait for a while and make sure he takes you out and spoils you. you deserve that its a special thing to although someone into you.x
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A
female
reader, Helen05 +, writes (10 August 2005):
You are probably not ready. I feel that you are placing a lot of importance on penetration and not closeness. Be close to each other without having to think you always have to aim for sex. If you continue to have problems you might have to visit your doctor, as you may have an underlying medical or psychological condition that is making sex difficult for you.
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