A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I'm 37 years old and I've been with my wife for 16 years. I just found out that she's had an affair with a person at her job… We seem to both want to work things out but I’m not sure I can put that behind me, at least not anytime soon… Any advice on getting past something like this? Dose it every get any easier?
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2008): Hi i see u recieved answers like..she cheated on u once and she'lll do i t again...do not believe stuff u read or what ppl say..its easy to judge...if she is sorry and wants to make up give it another go....everyone is human and makes mistakes....make sure she loves u ...thats all i say
A
male
reader, Somethingeasy +, writes (23 December 2007):
 Shes cheated once she will cheat again. Leave her before she can hurt you and your family again.
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A
male
reader, Uraz  +, writes (23 December 2007):
 I do not think you will ever get over it completely. Remember Frasier, where he finds out his father's agony, years, years later, over the cheating of his mother.But it is your call. You will be better off, if you really want to forgive and forget, to try not to think about it and let the time pass because time is the only healer.But every wound will leave a scar, and you may get used to it and most of the times you will not notice it but when you are alone and reflecting, it will keep resurrecting.I were you, I wouldn't forgive her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): Geez, married for 16 years and she suddenly has a sexual affair with someone else? Is that what happened? There are a lot of questions I would have to ask here, but something has obviously gone wrong. Based on the very limited information provided, I'd have to say this marriage is on tilt. Hope no children are involved. It is very difficult for a "faithful" man to deal with a wife who has been "unfaithful." Go see a marriage counselor, man.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): 16 years of marriage is a lot, you really have to think things up. I am going throught a similar situation but I decided not to tell him that I knew about his one time thing; however I really think that is not working out for me 'cause I can't get it out of my head. It's been 3 years now and it still bothers me. Therefore, I my advice for you is to take some time off, to forget or forgive. Take as much as you need, time will only tell; you are still young and in time to re-do your life.
good luck
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A
female
reader, huneygyrl +, writes (23 December 2007):
 First of all, I am sorry to hear that. I've been in a relationship when infidelity occurred. I am still trying to get over it. Slowly but surely, it will vender over. Time is what it is. Your hurt will not just go away overnight. It will take you some time. You will grieve. Trust me, I know how you feel. Do you have a good friend, family member you can talk to? Vent to about how you feel? It feels a whole lot better when you just let it out. That's part of the grieving process. Keep your head up. My heart goes to you.
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