A
female
age
36-40,
Daisyface
writes:I slept with my boss recently, we are both single (he is a fair bit older than me), it was kind of planned and came after months of incredible sexual tension in the office! No one really knows and apart from a little awkwardness at first, everything is back to normal and the sexual tension has finally gone. We actually seem to get on better than ever and really talk instead of it getting in the way like it did for ages.What I am worried about is that I confided in my best freind and she hit the roof. She said that I was stupid and that he was only using me etc and that I had made myself look cheap by handing it to him on a plate, etc and will not listen to me with regards to my side of things. She is envisaging all sorts of complications in the future and seems to be determined to make me feel bad.She is wrong isnt she?? I am an adult and wasnt coerced into anything. I was dumped cruelly last year after 20 years and all I wanted was a night of physical stuff with someone who I knew and was game too. My boss and I still make conversation about meeting the perfect partner and I am sure that we both know we were just fulfilling our sexual desires until that happens. No one got hurt, no one is looking for more and no one where I work knows anything. I'm not wrong am I for doing this am I??
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cheap, my boss Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): You are not stupid or easy. Your friend is. Next time, keep your mouth shut and keep the secret you and him both hold
A
female
reader, Fade878  +, writes (26 March 2008):
 How reliable is your friend? Does she have good judgement? It may be hard to hear and definitely not what you want to hear but she is not in the situation and therefore has a better perspective.
She knows you better than anyone of us will/do.
How many times have you relied on her advice before? How many times has she come through? How many times had you wished you listened to her counsel?
I think she is looking out for you as that is what friends do and that is a good thing.
Tell her that you understand she loves you and wants you to be happy and not be hurt. Hug her.
Tell her that you are prepared to learn for yourself what lies ahead on this road. That you will accept the consequences, good or bad, from this decision.
She gave her advice/counsel...now put that to bed and be your friend in other matters.
Perhaps you should not tell her too many details.
You are right, you are an adult and you've made a choice.
Just know that for women...women need to like a man to have sexual relations with him. Men...don't really need that, they just like something that looks good. Not all men-just they are capable of having sex for sex only and not blur the sex with intamacy.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister  +, writes (26 March 2008):
 Please, you're not horrible- you went in with realistic expectations, you didn't hurt anyone, and you had a great time. Case closed!......congratulations. It is risky business though. This was no mistake, this was a good time.
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A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (26 March 2008):
 Oh a MAN can have a fling, but if a woman is comfortable with her sexuality and has a fling, it's WRONG??????? WTF????? You both used each other. I don't think that you are stupid at all.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): Yes you should only sleep with people who you are dating. However don't feel bad we all make mistakes sometimes. live and learn. Don't beat yourself up over it just forget it you said he dose not want more and you don't etheir so move on. good luck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): As long as you don't make a game of it. Don't do it agian or you could have problems at work. As my mother always said don't shit were you eat!
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