A
female
age
,
*ica
writes:I met my BF through a friend in a blind date. I though he was a whinner and he told me that all his female and ex girl friends were all the time mean with him. Also,his ex wife cheated on him after he took care of her kids and helped pay her house. After his divorce he had a GF and because she wanted to get marriaged to him,he left her.Since last year we are together. One thing that makes me upset is that his ex GF is all the time calling him and he talks with her for a while. He sometimes tells me that she calls,and it really makes me upset.Another day we fought because I told him to stop talking with her and he told me that he wont. She called and asked him to go to her `´fancy `` school,where she teaches and help her with her broke computer.He also told me that he would like to find and be fiend with his ex wife. Another thing that I am perceiving is that he loves talking with women in parties,and he NEVER introduces me to anybody! Sometimes he even gives me a cold shoulder. He has many female friends too. And one thing I feel is that his brother´s wife has a thing for him -and he defends her a lot ( like she is uneducated and because of that she doesnt like me).We went to a restaurant and he was looking with an amazing face to the waitress. All his friends and his brother tells me that he is the most amazing man,caring,...all,but I feel it is weird.I even went to a therapist but she told me that he has nothing wrong, and I am seeing something that doesnt exists.I´d like to ask help if you could help me.Thank you so much.
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female
reader, Bazinga  +, writes (6 November 2013):
 I'm guessing from your age he is an older gent. Some stay friends with exes although do not tend to hold any romantic feelings towards them. I am still friends with one ex, he meets up with my brother sometimes for a drink and to watch football. I don't feel any feelings towards him, once your boyfriend is treating you right and being a good partner I wouldn't worry too much about it.Maybe he doesn't realise you need to be introduced to friends - some men/women are not emotionally tuned in if their partner needs or has a lack of social skills. If you feel he is not giving you the right amount of attention tell him. Men look at beautiful women but hey once he doesn't touch that is the main thing. It doesn't mean he will think about the woman its just like a fleeting moment, you forget about the person.
A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (5 November 2013):
 It is a fact that some people do stay friends with their ex's and I think it's more common later in life.
I am still on friendly terms with my ex husband and also with one man I dated but there is nothing in it...we will never be together again in the future.
Your boyfriend seems like he does not want to commit fully, probably because he went through a bad divorce and some bad relationships, but maybe he feels that life is too short to ignore certain people and just wants to keep in touch...it is his life and he can do as he wants.
I understand why you would be upset, but that is because how he acts does not correspond with how you WANT him to act and he probably hasn't been with you long enough to decide if you and he will last.
He knows you are upset so ask for compromise, ask him to introduce you to his friends, or just introduce yourself if the opportunity arises and if you feel you cannot tolerate his 'friendships' then perhaps he isn't the right man for you.
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