A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi, my boyfriend and i liuve together, he is was divorced decades ago. my problem is, when his ex-wife calls or i hear her name being mentioned, i feel uncomfortable. when i try to be honest with him and tell him how i feel, he tells me that im the problem, or brushes me off sometimes. what do i do?:
View related questions:
divorce, ex-wife, his ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2008): I have to read between the lines here. If he was divorced decades ago I'm guessing he must be very much older than you. If he still gets on with his ex wife, then that's good, especially if they have children together.
Did you have a part to play in his divorce? Maybe if you did you're thinking he ran off with you leaving his wife behind, and you're thinking he might do the same to you?
I wouldn't say you're *the* problem, but I think you do have *a* problem because you sound rather insecure in this relationship.
What do you do? You try to relax a bit and try to stop being jealous or insecure. I'm sure if he was going to go back to his wife he would have done it a long time ago. He's with you now and if you're not careful you'll drive him away from you if your insecurities become all-consuming or irrational.
Is there anything in particular that makes you feel uneasy? Why are you getting wound up about the mention of his ex wife's name? Is there more to it than you've mentioned here?
|
